Monday 8 March 2021

In Their Own Words, Harry & Meghan Share Their Devastating Story

Meghan and Harry's sit-down interview was heartbreaking and devastating; insights into the unbearable turmoil and anguish they endured juxtaposed with moments of pure joy, news they are expecting a baby girl. It is their story, told courageously. You will see more coverage, opinion pieces and feature articles in the next 24 hours than you will care to read in a lifetime. With that in mind, I wanted to present this post precisely as it should be...in Meghan and Harry's words.


The Duchess described the morning of her wedding as an "out of body experience", knowing that it wasn't just their day but a day that was "planned for the world". Meghan recalled listening to 'Going to the Chapel' that morning having slept soundly the night before. Both Harry and Meghan had a secret of their own. "Three days before our wedding we got married." The vows framed in their home show them at their private wedding. "We called the archbishop, and we just said, 'Look, this thing, this spectacle is for the world, but we want our union between us. It was just the two of us in our back yard with the Archbishop of Canterbury."


Speaking about entering the Royal family, Meghan said, "I went into it naively because I didn't grow up knowing much about the Royal family. It wasn't part of conversation at home; it wasn't something we followed. I didn't do any research. I've never looked up my husband online. I didn't fully understand what the job was, what does it mean to be a working royal. There was no way to understand what the day to day was." The Duchess noted her mother Doria asked her several months ago if Diana had ever done an interview. "What do you know about the royals apart from what you read in fairytales?" Meghan added. On the institution Meghan said she "wasn't being protected", "they were willing to lie to protect other members of the family, but they weren't willing to tell the truth to protect me and my husband".

Meghan recalled meeting the Queen at Royal Lodge, the York's residence, for the first time by chance after church, where she swiftly learned to curtsy. I thought genuinely that that was what happens outside; I thought that was part of the fanfare. I didn't think that's what happens inside. I said, 'But it's your grandmother.' Harry said, 'It's the Queen.'" Meghan quickly learned a "deep curtsy" with Fergie asking her "are you ready?". "That was really the first moment that the penny dropped." Meghan described the first meeting as "lovely and easy". The Duchess noted she knew Princess Eugenie before Harry and the pair were friends.

On her relationship with Her Majesty, Meghan said the Queen "has always been wonderful to me". Recalling their joint engagement in Chester, when the pair travelled on the royal train, the monarch gave her a pair of pearl earrings -- which she wore on the day -- and a matching necklace. The Queen had a blanket covering her knees in the car and said, "Come on, Meghan," and shared it with her. Meghan said, "It made me think of my grandma as well." After Prince Philip was admitted to hospital the Duchess called Her Majesty. "This morning, I woke up earlier than H, and saw a note from someone on our team in the UK saying that the Duke of Edinburgh had gone to the hospital. But I just picked up the phone and I called the Queen just to check in."


We saw glimpses of the couple at home with Oprah in 'Archie's Chick Inn' with their rescue chickens. 


As the conversation turned to tabloid headlines, Oprah asked Meghan about a story which has been covered multiple times in multiple ways in the British press: the assertion Meghan made Kate cry. Meghan said the opposite was true. "I don’t say that to be disparaging to anyone because it was a really hard week of the wedding and she was upset about something. Yes, the issue was correct about flower girl dresses. I thought in the context of everything else going on in the days leading to the wedding, it didn’t make sense not doing what everyone else was doing, which was being supportive." Meghan continued, "And she did what I would do if I knew that I hurt someone, right, to just take accountability for it. Kate sent flowers and an apology. It wasn’t a confrontation. I don’t think it’s fair to her to get into the details of that, because she apologised. Also I think a lot of it that was fed into by the media -- and, look, I would hope that she would have wanted that corrected, and maybe in the same way that the palace wouldn’t let anybody else negate it, they wouldn’t let her, because she’s a good person."

Meghan continued, "What was hard to get over was being blamed for something that not only I didn’t do but that happened to me and the people that were a part of my wedding going to my comms team, saying, I know this didn’t happen and everyone in the institution knew it wasn’t true." Asked why she was held to a different standard she replied, "I don't know. They really seemed to want a narrative of a hero and a villain", "If you love me, you don't have to hate her. And if you love her, you don't need to hate me" She would later regard the palace's refusal to deny the story as "the beginning of a real character assassination". 

On how isolating life in London became "I am everywhere and I am nowhere. Has anyone talked about how it feels, because right now I could not feel lonelier". 

There was a lighthearted moment when Oprah spoke of the double standards in covering Meghan during her pregnancy, criticising her for "cradling her bump" and nonsense about avocadoes. Meghan smiled "That's a loaded piece of toast".

Discussing turmoil behind-the-scenes when she was expecting Archie and was told he wouldn't have titles nor security. "This went on for the last few months of our pregnancy, where I'm going, hold on a second -  he needs to be safe. "We have created this monster machine...clickbait and tabloids... You have allowed this to happen, which means we need to be safe.", On titles, she said: "The most important title I will ever have is mom. The idea of our son not being safe, and also the idea that the first member of color in this family not being titled in the same way that other grandchildren would be."

At this point Meghan revealed horrifying discussions were being held within the family "concerns and conversations about how dark his skin might be when he was born." When pressed by Oprah, Meghan declined to reveal which family member it was "I think it would be very damaging to them", she said. Meghan mentioned her Commonwealth travels and the importance of diversity within the royal family and seeing on the ground "how much it meant to them to be able to see someone who looked like them in this position. And I could never understand how it couldn't be seen as an added benefit, and a reflection of the world today."

Whilst we knew the Duchess was going through an incredibly painful time, the extent of it is deeply shocking and heartbreaking in equal measure. Meghan opened up about having suicidal thoughts. "I just didn't see a solution. I would sit up at night, like, I don't understand how all of this is being churned out. My mom and my friends kept calling me crying saying, 'Meg, they're not protecting you. It was all happening just because I was breathing. I was really ashamed to say it at the time, and ashamed to have to admit it to Harry especially, because I know how much loss he has suffered, but I knew that if I didn't say it, that I would do it and I just didn't want to be alive anymore. It was a very clear and real and frightening constant thought. I remember how he just cradled me. I went to the institution, and I said I needed to go somewhere to get help and I was told that I couldn't. I share this because there's so many people who are afraid to voice that they need help, and I know how hard it is not just to voice it but to be told no. I went to one of the most senior people to get help. I was told I couldn't because it wouldn't be good for the institution."

Meghan recalled attending an event at the Royal Albert Hall hours after telling Harry how she was feeling, they were "smiling and doing their jobs" but when the lights went out she was "weeping". Meghan recalls Harry's knuckles gripping around hers. 


Before Harry joined his wife, Meghan looked to the future, "I'm not going to live my life in fear. I don't know how they could expect that after all of this time, we would still just be silent if there was an active role that the firm is playing in perpetuating falsehoods about us. At a certain point you're going to go, someone tell the truth. If that comes with a risk of losing things, there's a lot that's been lost already. I've lost my father, I lost a baby, I nearly lost my name, there's the loss of identity. I'm still standing, and my hope for people in the takeaway from this, is to know that there's another side, to know that life is worth living."

When Harry stepped in the couple had some wonderful news to share - they are expecting a baby girl this summer! Harry said it's "amazing", "Just grateful. To have any child, any one or two, would be amazing. But to have a boy and then a girl, what more could you ask for. Now we have our family, the four of us and our two dogs. It’s great."


Speaking about breaking point Harry said he was "desperate". Dealing with "this constant barrage", his biggest fear was "history repeating itself". Adding it was an even more dangerous time "because you add race in and social media". He felt totally unsupported within the firm. "When you see something happening in the same kind of a way, anyone would ask for help especially when you know there's a relationship there, they could help you share the truth, call off the dogs, whatever you want to call it" Adding, "It takes living in her shoes to see where it was going to go and how far they were going to take it, and get away with it. I've spent many years doing the work and doing my own learning. But then my upbringing and the system, in which I was brought up in, and what I've been exposed to, I wasn't aware of it to start with. But my God, it doesn't take very long to suddenly become aware of it." 

Harry discussed the impact on his own mental health "I had no idea what to do, I went to a very dark place as well, but I wanted to be there for her". He also felt he couldn't seek help from his family as Meghan struggled, "It's not a conversation easily had in the institution. I was ashamed of admitting it to them, I don't know if they've had the same feelings or thoughts. I have no idea. I didn't have anywhere to turn to, the family, they very much have this mentality of, this is just how it is, you can't change it, we've all been through it. What was different for me was the race element, it wasn't just about her, it was about what she represents."

On their time in Canada in late 2019, Harry reflected on calls with the Queen, and conversations with his father until "he stopped taking my calls". "By that point, I took matters into my own hands. I needed to do this for my family. This is not a surprise to anybody, it's really sad that it's gotten to this point, but I've got to do something, for my own mental health and my wife's. And for Archie's as well, because I could see where this is headed." Harry said he felt "trapped" and "didn't see a way out" of life within the institution. "My father and my brother, they are trapped. They don't get to leave, and I have huge compassion for that."

Harry continued "For this union and the specifics around her race, there was an opportunity - many opportunities - for my family to show some public support. One of the most telling parts and the saddest parts was over seventy female members of Parliament, both Conservative and Labour, came out and called out the colonial undertones of articles and headlines written about Meghan. Yet no one from my family ever said anything. That hurts." Harry added he is "acutely aware of where my family stand and how scared they are of the tabloids turning on them.".

On how his mother would feel if she were here today "I think she would feel very angry with how this has panned out, and very sad. But ultimately, all she'd ever want is for us to be happy. I  think she saw it coming. I certainly felt her presence throughout this whole process. I'm just really relieved and happy to be sitting here talking to you with my wife by my side. I can't begin to imagine what it must have been like for her, going through this process by herself all those years ago. It has been unbelievably tough for the two of us, but at least we had each other."

When asked about the conversations Meghan referred to about Archie's skin tone, Harry confirmed they took place but declined to discuss the matter further. "I'm not comfortable with sharing that. But it was right at the beginning, it was at the beginning when she wasn't going to get security, when my family suggested that she might continue acting because there wasn't money for her." 

Harry said "without question" they would still be in the UK if they had been supported. He said his family were all very welcoming at the start, though things changed after the Australia tour. "That brought back memories. Too see how effortless it was for Meghan to come into the family and be able to connect with people." He stopped short of confirming there was jealousy within the family, saying he "wished" lessons could be learned from the past. 


Harry also revealed the family cut him off financially at the beginning of 2020 and it was thanks to his inheritance from Diana they were able to make this work "I've got all my mum left me. And without that, we would not have been able to do this. She saw it coming and I certainly felt her presence throughout this whole process." They also lost their security. Meghan said she wrote letters to the royal family pleading with them to change their minds to no avail. Around this time, Tyler Perry stepped in and helped the couple. 

On his relationship with his brother, "I love William to bits. He's my brother. We've been through hell together. I mean, we have a shared experience. But we're on different paths. Time heals all things. Hopefully." Regarding his father, "There's a lot to work through there, you know? I feel really let down, because he's been through something similar. He knows what pain feels like, and this is and Archie's his grandson. At the same time, of course I will always love him, but there's a lot of hurt that's happened. And I will continue to make it one of my priorities to try and heal that relationship." As for Her Majesty;  "My grandmother and I have a really good relationship and an understanding. I have a deep respect for her. She's my colonel in chief. She always will be."

When asked if they have regrets, Harry replied, "I'm really proud of us. I'm so proud of my wife. She safely delivered Archie during a period of time that was so cruel and so mean. Every day I was coming home to Meghan crying and breastfeeding Archie. We did what we had to do" Meghan said her one regret was "Believing them when they said I would be protected". 


On their life now, Harry said "This year has been crazy for everybody, but to have outdoor space where I can go on walks with Archie, and we can go for walks as a family, and the dogs, we can go for hikes or down to the beach. I guess the highlight for me is sticking him on the back of a bicycle in his little baby seat and taking him on bike rides, which is something I was never able to do when I was young". Archie's favourite word at the moment is "hydrate" and when anyone leaves the house the adorable tot says "drive safe".


Oprah asked Harry if meeting Meghan saved him, he replied "Without question. There was a bigger purpose". Meghan disagreed, "He saved all of us. He made a decision that saved my life". Asked if her story with Harry has a happy ending, the Duchess replied, "This is just the beginning for us. It's greater than any fairytale you've ever read"


'Meghan was the Crown's greatest opportunity for change, regeneration, and reconciliation in a new era. They didn't just maltreat her light--they missed out on it.

Meghan is living the life Diana should have, if only those around her had been as brave as she was. Meghan isn’t living a life without pain, but a life without a prison.

This isn't Meghan's princess ‘happy’ ending. But sometimes change, the decisions that bring us the most hurt, aren't about about happiness, but healing.

Unclear if this will change the Royal family, but Meghan's strength will certainly redefine family everywhere. Think of the women who will be inspired to stand up for their lives, the partners who will be kinder and more courageous than the kin they were born into'. 

- Amanda Gorman, National Youth Poet Laureate

Admin Note: Comments on this post are now closed. 

227 comments:

  1. Tammy from California8 March 2021 at 07:36

    That was seriously a whopper! A.WHOPPER.

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  2. Just a small correction you wrote: "they were willing to lie to protect other members of the family, but they weren't willing to lie to protect me and my husband", but she said " they weren't willing to tell the truth to protect...". I'm really happy Meghan and Harry leave, it was the right decision for them.

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  3. Louise from NZ8 March 2021 at 07:58

    I haven't seen the whole interview but it saddened me to hear of how much of a struggle it has been. None of us could ever have truly understood what they were going through.
    They are both very brave and courageous to have stepped away.
    I wish them well for the future and look forward to seeing what happens in their future.
    P.s I've always loved your blogs Charlotte. Keep up the well written and informative posts. :)

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  4. I think as a middle name they should give their daughter Diana’s middle name, Frances.

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  5. ILoveElephants8 March 2021 at 08:33

    This interview was so heartbreaking to hear, I am soo glad they left London and are enjoying sunny California. My favorite part was when they revealed the baby is a girl🎀. On a sad not, my heart broke when Meghan said she was having thoughts of suicide. I can’t believe no one helped her. Prince Harry is such a great husband in getting his family out of there. I also can’t believe someone was “ concerned” on what Archie’s skin color would be. What a horrible thing to say about a baby. I am not a mother yet but I felt a certain anger inside me at the idea of a family member questioning your child’s skin tone. I wonder who it is? My money is on princess Michael of Kent. I really hope I am right and it’s not William or Kate, I still am their fan.

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    1. I can't believe no one helped her either, like, literally don't believe they told her she couldn't get help. Mental health had been a HUGE part of W & K & H's outreach for several years.

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    2. Harry said they didn’t tell the family. So how were W&K supposed to help?

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    3. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:08

      Anon 19:44, the relentless abusive (and often racist) coverage was everywhere. Meghan went to palace aides, who have no secrets, for help. Meghan and Harry did that interview specifically saying they weren't ok while on tour in South Africa. W&K most likely knew.

      They'd have to be deaf, blind, and have their heads in the sand not to know.

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  6. I am so moved. I understand that it was vital for the high potential Sussexes to leave this toxic environment. What hypocrisies! I am not surprised by this reality that this royal circle is, but I am deeply disappointed because it is an institution which in the end uses the values ​​of the Commonwealth and others to pass itself off as what it is. not.

    We do not expect the crazy love of this firm but at least for what it preaches, in strong defense of the respect and values ​​of others. I am really disappointed Charlotte; and when it affects children it is still intolerant and indigestible. For me, from the Queen, from Charles to William, I have a very big disappointment. We must not hide our face, if these behaviors and all this hypocrisy reign, it is because they are not ultimately different from this Jo Marney: on the surface perhaps they make it appear the opposite but at bottom and in internal is contempt.

    I'm sorry for them, I don't see how in the short or long term, this family will come out growing in the public eye with this reality?
    Imagine the representatives of the Commonwealth! What hypocrisy when they come face to face! If you are not concerned about the stress, and the mental health of your mixed-race daughter-in-law and if you do nothing to eradicate the dismissive terms aimed at your great-grandson and grandson etc ... then who? will believe that the values ​​of the Commonwealth are important to you ???

    Angela

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    1. I do think in other ways Harry is supportive, however, I don’t think he was in that instance. Your wife mentions she is having suicidal thoughts, and you say she should skip the event? Seems odd to leave someone who is suicidal, alone. I get it “do what you gotta do” or he had to go to the event. However, he could have made an excuse and stayed home. The press would talk anyway. Just seems odd he was willing to leave her alone. Again, I get he has a job to do, but if his wife’s life is on the line, it just seemed an odd response.

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    2. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:11

      Megs, I see what you're saying, but I'm sure there was more to their conversation than that.

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    3. I interpreted that more as allowing her an "out" if she didn't want to go out and be photographed for a few hours that night and then see further negative headlines the following day. I see your point in not letting her be left alone, but I think he was trying to give her space from the press.

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  7. Thank you Charlotte for this prompt and detailed post. The interview was hard to watch I have to say. I was saddened to hear it was Kate Middleton who made Meghan cry over flower girl dresses. I am saddened to hear that the palace and Kate didn't ensure that the narrative was corrected despite apologizing to Meghan for making her cry. I admire Kate so its disheartening for sure. I can't see Prince William and Harry being close ever again after these revelations and that is so sad as they were so close and their mother Diana would not have wanted that I know.

    So sad that the royal family did not support and protect these two despite Meghan asking them for direct help.
    I was shocked that the royal family told them that Prince Harry's son would not be a prince and would not have security. I thought it was Harry and Meghan's decision not to make Archie a prince I didn't realize they were forced into this decision. I do have to wonder if it is because he was mixed race.

    I have to say I was very surprised that she admitted to being so naive on entering the royal family and did no research on what her life would look like as a working royal. That was surprising. Also was surprised to hear that no one in the royal family provided her with any guidance and training on how to curtsy etc I am not sure if that is true as she interrupted Harry as he seemed to try and interject there. Shocked to hear Harry say they told him before they got married that she should continue acting because there wasn't enough money to pay for her.

    I was disgusted to hear that the royal family were concerned on how dark Archie's skin would be when he was born. That is utterly disgusting racism and surprising from Harry's immediate family. Does this means if he had fallen in love with a full dark skinned Black woman they would have freaked out? I now assume so.

    I can't fathom that Meghan went to the royals and said she was suicidal and needed help and they told her NO! This makes me so livid!!! did they not learn a damn thing from Diana? Diana must be weeping from above!

    Surprised to hear Prince Charles stopped taking his own sons phone calls and cut his own son off financially too in 2020. It was eye opening to see that they went to netflix and spotify not because they wanted to but because they needed it to pay for security. I knew Charles was cold to Diana but always thought he had an airtight loving relationship with his sons and would never do something like this. I am so disappointed in Charles yet again. Then taking away Harry's security when he was born a Prince... What a cold family. Hearing how hurt Prince Harry said he was about his father's Prince Charles lack of support to him and his grandson Archie was heartbreaking. It is just so sad this whole family which APPEARED so close split like this. I don't see it ever repairing. I have to say I shed a few tears tonight over Meghan being suicidal and Harry losing the love and support of his family.

    To see how history repeats itself with Meghan from Diana and how the royals were once again jealous of Meghan for doing well in Australia it is just so damn upsetting. I am glad they set the record straight for everyone that they never would have left if they had just gotten some support.I was a big monarchist before after this interview not so much.

    On a happy note loved hearing they are having a little girl, loved seeing them happy with Archie on the beach.The royal family has lost something special in these 2 which is so sad. Meghan says she has lost her dad. Meghan felt like Ariel but felt she now has her voice back. The whole thing is heartbreaking.

    I cried and cried when Harry said that after his family cut him off that it was Princess Diana's money that kept him going or he wouldn't have been able to do this. It just made me miss her and wish she was here and a beautiful gift she left for him. She protects him even in death.

    I wish Harry and Meghan every happiness.

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    1. Actually, Archie is not a prince due to the letters of Patent that George V issued in 1919 that only Children and grandchildren of the sovereign are HRH. Archie is the sovereign's Great -Grandchild. When Prince Charles becomes King then he is entitled to the title of HRH. There were other titles of Harry's that they could have chosen to use. Outside of G, C & L, none of the other great grandchildren are styled HRH.

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    2. You are right, no one is. But a letters patent could easily have been issued for Archie as it was for George before he was born. George wouldn't have had a title either. And Charlotte and Louis are out of the direct line, but they are Prince/ss.

      If I were Meghan and discovered my child, who arguable faces more threats than Williams, would not have security I would blow a gasket.

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    3. caroline in montana8 March 2021 at 21:46

      Zara, Peter and Eugenie's children have no titles either, as well as Anne's own children and Edwards children. sad that this even came up.

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    4. CAP, Meghan's concern was more for the security of Archie as they were negotiating this half-in / half-out arrangement was being negotiated behind the scenes while she was still pregnant. But also, my understanding is that the suits wanted Archie to not be styled HRH or be called the Earl of Dumbarton even if Charles becomes king. So no titles for Archie at all and no security for all three of them. That's why the security stopped as of 1st Qtr of 2020. I could understand cutting taxpayer funded security but Charles not offering to pay from private funds--that's something else if you know your Son is greatly concerned about stalkers and paparazzi. Plus in the papers, they made it appear that Harry and Meghan wanted this outcome of no titles (like Anne chose for her children) but it turns out they didn't. Meghan and Harry wanted Archie to have a title but were silenced.

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    5. caroline in montana,

      You are absolutely right regarding Zara, Peter and Eugenie's children. However, Prince Andrew's daughters do have the princess title, so why was Archie denied a title?

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    6. Edward’s children DO have titles. They are the exact same as William and Harry and Beatrice and Eugenie as grandchildren of the sovereign in the male line. Their parents just choose to use the lesser ones. Archie and his sibling WILL be grandchildren of the sovereign in the male line when Charles is King. So not at all comparable to the other children: they’re comparable to George, Charlotte and Louis. The only reason Charlotte and Louis have titles now is because of the addendum in 2012 to them and only them. But they would have gotten them when Charles became king anyway. If this move actually happens it only pertains to Meghan and Harry’s children and feels REALLY petty and overturns 100 years of precedent.

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    7. Anon 19:25, only grandchildren in the male line, along with the children of the eldest son of the eldest son of the monarch can be HRH. Eugenie and Beatrice are male line grandchildren, so they are entitled to be HRH, while Archie is a great-granchild of the monarch through the 2nd child of the eldest son of the monarch, so he is not entitled to be HRH until Charles is king.

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  8. Thank you, Charlotte – as usual you are on the ball.
    I haven’t watched the complete interview yet, but wow. The revelations, while many people expected it, are worse when they’ve confirmed it. Question, does she talk about Thomas Markle and her sister in the interview? I don’t see any references to them.
    I wonder how many people sat down to watch the interview, because of the palace’s smear campaign. While I am loath to dismiss the bully claims, the timing is very off.
    I also wonder about two things:
    1. Who is in charge at Buckingham Palace? Going by what Harry said, it doesn’t seem like the royals are. So who makes these decisions?
    2. I wondered how much strategy played a role in Harry and Meghan’s decision to not reveal names. What I mean is: Did they not reveal the names of the mentioned people because of love and respect; or because they use the names to keep the palace in check? A situation like: keep you dogs at bay, or we will release the names and ruin reputations, because in current climate, names could be very damaging. This is something I would do, especially if I had kids to protect. Keep some information back, so that the palace knows not to start or escalate something. [Even if they have already gone too far.]

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    1. Meghan talks about her father and half-sister in this extra clip CBS released (they had to cut some things out to fit the runtime): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CkTVoLamPio&ab_channel=CBSThisMorning

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    2. I watched the whole interview. Oprah never brought up her father and half-sister. I feel like that could be a whole separate two-hour interview.
      With regard to your second question, I can see the decision not to reveal names as calculated strategy, but I'm guessing it's because he's still hoping to heal those relationships, like the offenders will recognize who they are when watching the interview and apologize.

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    3. This morning there was an interview with Oprah on CBS Morning Show. They discussed the interview and many more interview clips were shown. Yes, Meghan talks about her father and 'half' sister - and oh boy, those revelations were just as OMG as the rest of their story. Elle

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  9. Dont forget to watch the 1/2 hour extra exclusive moments from this interview on CBC This Morning later today. I really want to see what more they say after this shocking and sad interview. Charles let me down the most here more than the press or anything and i feel it is him who made the skin colour comment about archie in my heart of hearts

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    1. I agree with you. I was very disappointed that Meghan brought Kate into it. I realize that Oprah initiated it, but it would have been classy to evade that one. Perhaps the two women were not as close as hoped, perhaps Kate was too busy with her young children and Royal duties to welcome Meghan and befriend her as Meghan wished, but I do not for one second think that Kate was unkind. Nothing in the 10 plus years of reporting as ever indicated that she is anything other than kind and gracious. William will never forget her pulling Kate into that Interview, and by all accounts he is a strong minded man with a temper. I think without a doubt the brothers’ relationship is finished. That said, I wish Harry and Meghan the best in their new life, and really hope there are no more Interviews airing dirty laundry on either side.

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    2. And why shouldn’t Meghan defend herself when a situation was manipulated to make her look like the bad guy? For months a story circulated about her making Kate cry and nothing was said. You’re also conveniently leaving out that Megan went out of her way in this interview to say Kate apologized for the incident and all is forgiven, and that Kate is a good kind person. But Megan absolutely has the right to defend herself when asked a direct question about a story that was apparently untrue and painted her as the villain when the opposite occurred. Megan did not say she Kate was unkind she explicitly said the opposite and that she was welcoming. I’d like to also point out that nothing in the time Megan has been in the public eye before she began her relationship with Harry has indicated she is anything other than kind and gracious either. She was specifically pointing out press story manipulations that she was not allowed to defend herself over. Now she can. So she did. I really think this comment is not understanding the context of why this story was clarified.

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    3. I don’t think she “pulled her into it” she clarified what really happened. She was blamed for something she didn’t do. She admitted Kate said sorry and brought her flowers, which means Kate knew that she was in the wrong. Everyone makes mistakes, Kate owned up to it and said sorry.

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    4. That being said, I just remembered she just had Louis, so she could have not been herself either. So while she deserves a break too, it was right of her to say sorry

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    5. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:13

      Meghan did not drag Kate into anything. She diplomatically set the record straight *while also* specifically saying Kate apologized and they made up.

      Meghan was certainly allowed to tell her side of the story, which she did in a very delicate way.

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    6. She should have explained what the original dispute was abput Maybe there were hurt feelings on both sides.

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  10. I haven't seen the interview, just your report. Thank you.
    They took the right decision for them. The only thing I don't think was nice is what Meghan said about Kate. I remember Kate had given birth 3 weeks before the wedding. She must have been either heavily pregnant or just postpartum at the time. What about remembering and mentioning this too? Kate was in a vulnerable situation at the time.

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    1. That was my takeaway from that part of the interview too. Meghan could have discussed that incident in a way that showed how the truth gets twisted, but also expressed compassion for Kate also being vulnerable and stressed during that time period. They know Kate can’t tell her side of the story, so it leaves the impression that Kate was the “bad guy” during FlowergirlGate. And that’s not going to sit well with Kate fans. Feels like an unforced error on the part of Meghan, who otherwise painted a sympathetic picture of how trapped and abandoned she felt.

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    2. Meghan did say that Kate is a good person. But I think more than the confrontation itself, she was disappointed that the twisted (in fact, complete opposite) narrative presented by the tabloids--published 6 months post-wedding--was never corrected. I respect Kate and think she deserves a lot of sympathy too, but I do wonder if this fear of the tabloids turning on her again drives a lot of her decisions/silences.

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    3. And let's not forget that ordinary weddings trigger all sorts of responses in family members. I had a sister-in-law screaming obscenities at me on the phone after I invited my nephews (3 and 5) to be ring bearers. And then had my brother call me back to call me abusive after she slammed down the receiver. She believed I wanted to use her children to show off at my wedding; whereas, I wished the people who meant the most to me to be part of a small & simple family ceremony of 20 people. No apology offered at any time for that. Not from either of them. Weddings are like that.

      Meghan was very nice about how she dealt with the Kate story. She corrected the falsehoods printed in the press, then she indicated that Kate had apologized and sent flowers as well as stating that she is a good person. Important points stated with gentleness. How could it be any nicer than that?

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    4. I’m flabbergasted people are thinking Megan should have been more gracious or tactful in relaying this story. She could not have been more polite and praising of how Kate handled what sounds like a relatively minor pre-wedding stress boil over. That is a huge mark of Megan’s class to me to ensure that that is what is on the record about her feelings about Kate. I really am mystified that people are seeing it any other way. What Megan is clearly defending herself over is that a narrative went in the tabloids for months that she made Kate cry, and she wasn’t allowed to say anything about this. Now she can. That’s her right.

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    5. As you say, weddings are stressful. H&M’s must have been stressful beyond belief.

      The point I was trying to make about it being a mistake for Meghan to explain the crying incident, without explaining what was behind the tears, was this: Meghan knows that there’s a Kate vs Meghan narrative, and she knows that Kate is trapped by rules about what she can, and cannot say, so it seems risky to have gone into some detail about the Crying incident, because it perpetuates the Kate v Meghan storyline, and Kate can’t present her viewpoint.

      We don’t know whether the incident also left Kate in tears, and perhaps Meghan didn’t know that part either. So maybe the actual incident was a little less “Kate made Meghan cry, and apologized for it” and a little more “emotions were high for both parties, and Kate said something that triggered Meghan, and Kate felt badly about that, and sent flowers to M with a little note to express hope that they could move past it, and was hoping that Meghan would also express a similar sentiment”?

      Before I’m accused of being a Hater, I’m not on either Team Kate nor Team Meghan. They are both interesting to follow. They both have tough, and great, lives. I wish them both happiness. I just feel like it was an error for Meghan to explain the Crying situation the way she did, because it continues to perpetuate a storyline that they have been at odds. And maybe that’s the case, but I find it hard to believe that Kate was a major player in the lack of support Meghan felt from the Firm. If she were, and Meghan sort of hinted that she felt that way, then we’ve all been fooled by a woman who appears to be very gracious and kind.

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    6. Meghan did say that she kept the "incident" secret. I think it was then shameful to not come out with at least "Meghan did not do that" by the Cambridge team.

      Delete
    7. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:16

      Zippy, I think it's clear that Kate vs Meghan is already a perpetuated storyline that hasn't and isn't going anywhere, in which case I think Meghan was perfectly entitled to diplomatically set the record straight. Even if there is more to the story, she definitely didn't throw Kate under the bus.

      If the palace could refute Tatler's Catherine the Great story and Kate having botox stories, they could've refuted this. They didn't. Meghan was vilified for it. So now, she's saying what her experience was.

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    8. Meghan and Harry were extremely stressed before the wedding as we all know and Kate was in the last stages of pregnancy so we can understand how a comment about the bridesmaids could have caused upset on both sides. Kate apologised and sent flowers but we are not told how Meghan reacted. She apparently still blames Kate for the one sided leak about the incident. Maybe she should have taken the opportunity to explain exactly what it was all about so we could decide for ourselves. We still have only one side of this story.

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  11. If she didn’t have her passport how could she travel to the US at least twice that we know? For the babyshower and the US open.

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    1. Sorry to be thought of as rude, but really? This is the only question gleaned from
      the interview.

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    2. Someone said she didn't need passport if traveling in private jet, only some form (forgot what they said) of identification

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    3. I mean, it's not like they burned all her documents. She had to turn them in. My guess from the situation she described is that she probably had to get explicit permission for international travel, and would get her passport temporarily if given approval (which is a disturbing level of control to exert over fully-grown adults, don't get me wrong).

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    4. She obv had to ask and have all travel cleared. And her passport given back to her for that purpose. And yes you do need it when traveling internationally via private plane. And you’re trying to pick apart some sort of falsehood? She was describing this in the context of how limited she was in spontaneous activity, lunch with friends, or god forbid leaving when she was in a crisis, she was saying she couldn’t easily do that (I.e. couldn’t just call an Uber example)

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    5. I’m American and this is just a guess, but Prince Harry doesn’t even have a last name so perhaps they don’t need regular passports when they travel. The other possibility, and it sounds snarky, is that perhaps she was traveling on a British passport....

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    6. Prince Harry doesn’t even have a last name so perhaps it’s not necessary for them to carry basic identification. Or...perhaps she wasn’t allowed to have her American passport. Those are just guesses. I’m American and I feel that I might feel that my British passport wasn’t as reassuring as having access to my American passport.

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    7. Prince Harry would have a passport and his surname is Wales after his father Charles Prince of Wales. When he and William were children and attended school and after when they did military service they were both used Wales as their surname. Archie’s surname is Mountbatten Windsor which is another surname used by the royal family. SP

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    8. Not having a last name does not exclude one from needing a passport. Also, Meghan couldn't have a British passport as she is an American citizen. Just because she married a British citizen doesn't allow her a British passport.

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  12. This was heartbreaking. I pray for the health and physical and mental well-being of the Sussex family. I think most of us black people saw this coming when we heard that Prince Harry was marrying a biracial girl. We might be in the 21st century but the history of these European royal families and their deep ties with colonialism, slavery and imperialism made it hard to believe it would be smooth sailing for this California girl. As disgusted as I am to hear about royals worrying over an innocent unborn baby skin tone that's exactly the type of conversations I expect people raised in these insulated whites-only bubbles to have behind closed doors. Yes Meghan was a great opportunity for the royal family and they missed out on it. I think all of us black people will no doubt immediately think back on this interview and how royals really feel about people of color whenever we will see them in majority black countries or black communities on their engagements: this is a stain they can never unwash as far as I'm concerned. That being said I'm happy Archie and his future little baby sister get to grow up in a more diverse and accepting environment.

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    1. You are so right. It will be hard for the Royal Family to have any kind of credibility with a number of issues with which they associate themselves--mental health, celebrating the Commonwealth, maternal and early childhood well-being, the list goes on. If William, Kate, and Charles can't/won't/don't support their own family then I have zero interest in hearing their opinions or 'influence' on these matters. I also think the RF owe an apology to all of the Black women in the world who were triggered by having to relive their own personal experiences with racism through Meghan's accounts of her trauma (and especially the garbage press release from the palace last week). Optimistically, I hope this helps white people do better in the workplace to make sure this isn't happening in our own offices. Meghan has a way of inspiring others to be more honest, open, thoughtful, and compassionate. I think this interview will have that effect on supporting women of color at work as well as those coping with mental health issues.

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  13. Very very heartbreaking interview. Thank you Charlotte for your post. I have a question. Meghan said family members had conversations with Harry about how dark Archie’s skin would be and They didn’t want him to be a prince or princess...but i read Archie can’t be a prince until Charles is king, based on a George V decree. So this is misunderstanding no ? is it true ? it's important to know otherwise people in the world are believing it's due to racism.

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    1. I was very confused by this as well, I thought at the time H & M said they didn't want Archie to have the title so he could lead a more normal life...but maybe that was a cover? This interview raises more questions than it answered really.

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    2. Many of Queen Elizabeth's grandchildren are not price or princess. None of Princess Anne's children or grandchildren, for example. Neither of Prince Edward's children, for another example.

      Considering Harry's self-described wish to escape being a prince and his pity for his father's and brother's inability to escape being princes, why is it so important to Meghan that her son be styled as a prince? A prince living in California, where we don't have royalty!! I totally agree with Harry and Meghan that their children need protection, but why would they want to inflict the status of "royal" when their life choices have been to escape royalty??

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    3. Since Meghan referenced the George V letters of patent directly, my interpretation was that the royal family wanted to change the existing rule so that Archie wouldn't be entitled to a title in the future (when Charles becomes king).

      We have known for a long time that Charles wanted a "slimmed-down" monarchy, so that probably played a role, but I think it's really alarming that the security element was so inextricably tied to the title. Especially given how huge Harry and Meghan's profile had become, globally. And I can't fault Meghan for being disturbed by the rules changing SPECIFICALLY for her child, the first mixed-race child to be born in the BRF.

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    4. What she said was that the palace were taking steps to change that convention so when Charles became king Archie would not become a Prince.

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    5. Anonymous 16:07, these discussions were happening while Meghan was pregnant with Archie. Well before they decided to leave the BRF. And in fact it seems like the security being withheld was part of a long line of breaking points that led to their decision to leave.

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    6. Anon 18:02 yes I agree this is what she was getting at but it was a little unclear in the interview. And to be fair most lay people don’t know the details of royal letters patent they can be quite confusing. But she was talking in the context of when Charles became King and already they were indicating this existing protocol would be changed with regards to Archie. And I think the security element is what bothered her more than the style and what she really didn’t understand why it was suddenly different with her son.

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    7. The Queen had already removed Beatrice and Eugenie's security coverage and told Andrew that he had to pay if he wanted it for them. Apart from William's family none of the great grandchildren get security coverage but maybe it wasn't explained correctly to Meghan? Ditto the question of who is called a Prince or Princess. For example Kate does not have the formal title until she becomes Princess of Wales . The Queen makes a distinction between those "blood Princesses" and women who marry into her family. This is very insulting and stuffy but it is her traditionalist attitudes rather than deliberate discrimination. And yes it is the Queen who ultimately decides so it is her we should criticise of we think it is wrong.

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    8. In my opinion, I think we did not quite capture Meghan's concern about this title issue in context. It should already be emphasized that the question of Archie's title arises when they have not yet decided by the couple to become non-active royals. And here it is still to be verified but I understood that Archie would not be entitled to his titles even after Charles is crowned etc ... So, even when is a person or a relative little concerned with having a royal title, it's understandable to feel frustrated when your child faces some sort of injustice when the laws grant it. And let's note that it is officially stated that the first Royals in line for succession are held by the King or Queen and cannot act or move freely and Archie will be sixth in line when Charles is King.

      Not being a person who gives importance to titles, it makes me uncomfortable that the beautiful little Archie has to face so small so many such trivial issues, but like I said, we can't help but feel injustice when we or our child is seen as a special species or doesn't get what we are entitled to even though we don't care.
      And since you manage your family like you manage office files at the Windsors, these frustrations are normal. Basically all of these are issues that could have been handled by the elders of the family if jealousy over the popularity and potential of the Sussexes had not taken hold. Conclusion, instead of figuring out how to channel the charm and strength of the Sussexes, some have decided that all means are good to demean and discredit this couple and we have the result in our eyes today.
      It saddens me that they have come to this but I understand because objectively, it is all those who participated in this family in this campaign of destruction of the Sussexes by their silence or their petty actions via lies and untimely nuisance on the personality of the Sussexes, who pushed them directly or indirectly to the discourse we have today.

      And today Buckingam's reaction to respond to the content of the Sussexes' speech proves me right because it shows that they could well have denied these slanders at the oppurtun time: we cannot remain silent on EVERYTHING unless the lie suits you . And today, why want to react instead of applying the "Never complaint ..."? Because the interview hurts them! So now they will understand how the Sussexes must have felt. I read that the Queen had not validated the answer for the moment and I think she immediately did well because this situation could turn into a tennis match.

      In a way, it was blackmail that was done by Charles and company to Harry to act only as it suited them and he forgot that both Harry and Meghan are not slaves or puppets. Yes there are royal rules but it must not turn into a dictatorship where some live in misfortune or at the expense of others: this is not what we want to see in 2021 in a royal family that wants to defend the rights of Man, mental problems, Commonwealth values. The attitude of Buckimgam and all the decision makers behind the Buckimgam executive cannot be tolerated.
      Thank you Charlotte for this uplifting, engaged and fair blog.

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    9. The Queen had already removed Beatrice and Eugenie's security and it was only after H & M moved to Canada and then USA that British security stopped looking after them . So it was only chat at the stage that Meghan was discussing.

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    10. I think people forget that the whole "streamlining the monarchy" concept always implied that Harry's children would not recieve the HRH. It will be the same for repective children of Charlotte and Louis- maybe even for both of them.
      I find it suprising that this comes as a shock? The palace has never said anything about the concept and it was only alluded this is what Charles wants without details, but the unhappiness about the massive numbers of royal hangers-on (esp. the Queens cousins) and the developments in other European monarchies really were a writing on the wall.

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    11. No the streamlining the monarchy talk always had to do with assumption that Harry and his family WOULD be working royals and HRH’s, he wanted to start slimming down the 9 million siblings and cousins and their kids. Obviously Harry and Meghan leaving complicated that.

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  14. It is riveting, sad, yet hopeful all at the same time. I am sorry Meghan reached a breaking point. It is also good news the couple is each other's rock. They both seem to have over come
    what Harry described, " a dark space".

    Yes it is a girl, and they have an important life event to look forward to. I wish them a a safe,
    healthy and happy delivery.

    Oprah: any regrets? Well Meghan has one and she had won over it. She thought she would be protected.

    The red flag for regrets they will have five years from now most likely will be relations with their fathers.

    Meghan: so much had been already lost – “I lost my father”.
    Harry: “My priority is to mend relations with my father.”
    Time does not wait. I wish both Meghan and Harry success in mending the rift with their fathers.

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    1. I am not going to wish success of Meghan and that man! He chose the money and Samantha time and again. Also willing to testify against his child. Meghan said "I lost my father, I lost a child" You can forgive someone but it doesn't mean you have to continue a relationship with them especially if they're family.

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    2. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:20

      This seems to be such a myth that a large part of society clings to -- that just because someone is family, they MUST be reconciled with, no matter how toxic they are. This is simply not true -- and it's dangerous.

      Thomas Markle kept going to the press and slandering Meghan over and over again, proving himself an untrustworthy father. Meghan can forgive him without reconciling with him, nor should she be expected to reconcile when his behavior has been so toxic.

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  15. Regarding Archie’s skin color, protection, and title – I was shocked to hear that just like Oprah was. It was saddening to hear that. Although the lack of security protection is the most critical, the race comment had not been sorted out fully. It was not clear in what context it was told to Prince Harry.
    Since it is a family member who said that to him, is it to say how the British society and the institution will perceive it? or is it a direct detachment and evaluation of their own blood
    line child as an exclusive.

    When it came to race, it seems there by title and protection was denied? The way Meghan put it, is as if title, protection, and racial status was all interrelated. Although she mentioned the “rules” of KG V, she also Implied other royal descendants in similar birth order have the title and protection.

    This is a bombshell which millions of people including members of The Commonwealth countries will
    weigh in. It is also a risky “sound bite” without context. Also, to be fair to Archie so he will not grow up in hostility, Oprah has a responsibility to have a discussion with them and make a statement.

    I watched this year's Commonwealth Day service one hour before the interview aired. The music and poetry was enjoyable. The presenter of the service dressed in green reminds me of Meghan in green dress at the same service in 2020.

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  16. Let's hope this interview leads the BRF to real changes even if I have great doubts... In the releasing of all this, I do hope the international support led for a charity baby shower in April 2019 for their first child was also a great source of support for both of them. I re-read your article on it and their Instagram post about it and I really hope it helped their mental health.
    Also thank you Charlotte for an honest and great article, could you perhaps edit your article to remind people the hotline US and UK numbers for those suffering of suicidal thoughts? I think it's even more important now to put it forward for those who could need it.
    Also, are you aware of another charity baby shower for their second child? With all the horrible headlines we can expect in the few weeks, a show of support like this one would be great.

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  17. I haven’t watched the interview in its entirety cuz it is not broadcasted in Thailand. However, pieces of the interview has saddened and to some extent horrified me of the life Meghan lived during her time as the working royal. As a person with mental health problems and suicidal thoughts myself, I can relate to her and her effort to live with it during the darkest times. It’s very hard.

    Very brave of her to come up and speak about it.

    Thank you Charlotte on this beautifully written post. If anyone know where I can watch the interview, feel free to advice me :)

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  18. Thank you as always Charlotte. I was very upset watching the interview. Much I expected. And I’m sure there will still be hand wringing and headlines about both sides and who’s right and more narratives will continue to emerge as everyone jockeys for the best possible spin on this.

    My two immediate take always:

    Meghan was in a mental health emergency and received no help other than the desperation of her husband.

    Archie’s status right down to his skin color was discussed and debated.

    These to me are the two things that forced their hand. I don’t know how they could have stayed. I’m struggling with the younger royals supposed focus on mental health and how this could have happened. I also think Harry sort of alluded to the blind spot around racism. The family is in an extremely privileged and isolated bubble and may not have even realized how destructive the racism was, and their own complicity in when speculating over Archie. But as Harry also pointed out.. you can learn. He did, and they should. There’s no excuse in 2021 and representing a diverse commonwealth. But when you are part of institution who’s very meaning is steeped in birthright and hierarchy (and has been almost entirely white) this is a challenging mountain to climb.

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  19. Thanks you Charlotte.

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  20. I also find myself reflecting on Tyler Perry’s involvement. I think it’s notable that American Black entertainers, millionaires, public figures etc have quietly stepped in. The dynamics are subtle but it’s almost feels like we sent a Black American to be royal and this is what happened, so she’s home now and there’s a protection curtain being lowered and we don’t have to answer to anyone about how it looks or why. I’m glad they have what I assume is a quiet network of supporters and protection.

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    1. YES! I completely agree. To see Meghan's personal friends, former co-workers, and Black Twitter come to her defense has been so edifying for me as a supporter. It must mean the absolute world to Meghan and Harry. What a wonderful, generous man Tyler Perry is. We knew about him lending his home but the fact that he also covered their security, knowing and understanding that THAT was their issue, not how big a house they were in, was just so touching and beautiful.

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  21. So much hypocrisy And free lies. Now let's leave all those terrible times behind and let's move on.The best ! That's the good news: a little girl! What happiness! This child must still strengthen this beautiful dynamic couple that I love very much. 👌😍👏💖

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  22. I love your blog, that was covered so well!
    I'm glad that they did this interview, it was pretty illuminating. As an outsider, it's pretty hard to judge what's happening behind the scenes, what is there but you can't see, hidden behind "news" and reality. Made me reevaluate some on what I thought the Monarchy and being a royal is.

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  23. What. A. Tragic. Mess.

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  24. Charlotte, I don't remember Meghan saying I was Sarah who helped her practice to curtsy. She said Sarah ran out and asked "Are you ready?" From my understanding she told Oprah she didn't practice in the car, but once they got out her and Harry were doing it before Sarah ran out and asked if she was ready.

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  25. Shocking, heartbreaking, frustrating, and, above all, very very sad to hear these truths finally come to light. But happy for the liberation that Meghan and Harry must feel now. The truth sets you free, always. I watched the interview, hoping against hope to hear that the family showed up for them in private truly as a family, offering support, trust, and love. It’s so sad to know that wasn’t the case, especially after Meghan shared the dark suicidal ideation she experienced. To be told no, you can’t seek professional help... I’m just speechless. I can’t imagine how that must have felt. So many painful truths... the concerns and questions about Archie’s skin color, Meghan essentially living in a prison atmosphere, the blatant discrimination and racism in the choice to not provide security to Meghan and Archie. It’s all just shocking and sad.

    As an American, I’ve always been an Anglophile and have loved following the Royal Family; especially through Charlotte’s fantastic coverage on the blogs. I knew it wasn’t the fairy tale we read about as little girls growing up in the US, and I can see how the family as an institution has to play the media’s game. The BRF as an institution depends on positive press to justify their immense privilege and wealth, especially in this day and age. And the press depend on their access to the institution to sell stories, papers, and to exist. But I had hoped that certainly the family - not The Firm but the actual family - supported Meghan and Harry privately in real ways that M&H could count on and trust. Before last night, I’ve always suspected that Harry would have asked to step back as a full time working Royal eventually; even if he had married a UK citizen. To hear them say they always wanted to stay and continue the Queen’s work; it’s just so sad. It didn’t have to be this way. I don’t know what else to say except I’m glad Meghan survived and I’m glad they seem to have found peace. I hope The Family and the family learn from this. I hope good comes from this for all. I hope the family reaches out to M&H now, both in private as a family and in a public statement as The Family. They owe M&H that. Sadly, I don’t expect they will. Thank you, Charlotte, for your excellent reporting as always.

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  26. Dear Charlotte, I can not relate to the content because I do not have the words yet.
    But I do want to thank you from my heart for your work all these years.
    I know you started this blog with completely different intentions and expectations. Hopefully there will be lots of opportunities in the future when we can simply chat about style and philanthropy again.

    I have often felt that his blog is important in contributing to keeping the life light of the Sussexes in this harsh media world. Thank you for challenging yourself - you did it so extremely well.

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    1. Hear, hear! Kristina.

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    2. Beautifully put. Thank you, Charlotte. In sharing Meghan's light, your own shines so brightly and in turn helps so many of us who have found reliable information, interesting discussion, and a sense of community here. On International Women's Day, you are a woman I am grateful for!

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  27. This interview is still ringing in my head. The racism, the lack of support, the clear push off favoritism within the BRF, the lack of empathy from Charles - woof! I'm glad this interview happened, and I'm doubly glad M&H are good now! What luck to see a little bit of Archie & to be excited to welcome the Sussex's new daughter!
    The BRF have some work to do on themselves. I think Meghan & Harry did great with Oprah. Illuminating interview. -op

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  28. Dear Charlotte, thank you for writing this, so those of us who have no access to interview and could not stay up all night to see it, could know what was said.
    I found what i read shocking.
    First, about skin colour. Hearing the reports i thought it probably was conversation how it would be about eye color. How anyone in 2020 could think child being born darker could be any problem for someone born into such privilege and wealth. Really, how could it be problem and a concern to discuss? And why to discuss it any way, it can't be changed...
    Also about getting help with mental helth. How is it possible Meghan was denied help, if Harry himself said he got one when he needed. Her life was changing so rapidly, it would be logical to provide her with psycholog even if she wouldn't feel herself she needed one, even if she wouldn't have the outrageous press headlines every day for literally a year or more. It is confidential, what goes in these meetings, you know. Can it be, they really are so stereotypical about mental health, although they are campagning to normalise it?
    That sounds shocking...

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    1. The therapy part is indeed strange. Both Princes have publicly said they went to therapy. Harry could have surely intervened? I mean they definitely do have phones (otherwise the whole tapping into phones scandal wouldn’t have happened) and the internet.

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    2. It's not necessarily just therapy, though. There are levels, and it sounded like Meghan was experiencing a serious mental health emergency and wanted to be hospitalized due to suicidal ideation. I think that's what Buckingham Palace said "no" to, because it would be "embarrassing" to the family. Really disgusting, however you look at it.

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    3. When someone suffers from suicidal thoughts seeing a therapist is often not enough. You heard Meghan say she felt she could not be left alone. In such a situation the person can need a safe space with 24 hours care.

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    4. I think it was more than needing therapy. It sounded like a mental health crisis to me. Like a full blown emergency. And I suspect the scandal of that getting out led them to be shut down when trying to impress upon others how serious the situation was.

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    5. By giving her the resources she needed she could thrive and therefore continue to interrupt their goal of getting her out.... my opinion.

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    6. I read somewhere what she said (I’ve watched the interview twice and I can’t remember the exact wording) was more along the lines of requesting to go inpatient somewhere. Ironically I suppose at least they have the SHOUT line in the UK now (sorry, American here)

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    7. I also found the mental health comments unusual. It is our choice whether we share the details of our mental health with our family and friends or in this case, the world. I do not think it was appropriate to only provide some of the details (i.e. I asked for help and they said no) without providing the entire story. By leaving many details out (i.e. Was she wanting to see a therapist on a regular basis inside or outside the palace walls? Was she wanting inpatient treatment that would require secrecy from the media and needed to be planned for? etc) and/or why she was told she could not be accommodated, it automatically puts the blame on the “Institution”. Also, as another person commented, neither she nor Harry were in prison (though it may have felt like it). If the Institution was unwilling to provide her with the help she needed, the couple had plenty of contacts in the mental health field who certainly could have helped. Prince Harry was interviewed some time ago about how he finally had therapy to overcome the grief of losing his Mother. Why could he not have accessed the same help for his wife?

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    8. Anonymous 21:50- yep, nailed it. There's a reason none of this has made sense. How many of us have wondered why the RF would want to lose someone who is so talented, so gifted with people, who shines so bright? Because they don't want to be outshone so every time Meghan excelled, exceeded expectations, and engaged new fans, it was a threat not an asset in their jealous, warped sense of reality and hierarchy. And how confusing and hurtful for her--on the days she thought she did well, they saw her as failure. When she was at her lowest, she was exactly where they wanted her to be. It's all sick and I am glad they are free.

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  29. Susan in Florida8 March 2021 at 14:35

    Thank you Charlotte , you stayed up late creating this post . It was time the public heard the truth from H&M. How dreadful that the RF seems to give their greysuits so much power. Maybe blowing the lid off how things are done will free up William in the future ? My husband watched the interview with me, much to my surprise. He made a great observation: the institution was trying to leverage H&M into staying by not giving Archie a title or security , by cutting off money , by telling them Meghan should consider acting work , and to their credit they didn’t give in.
    Showing Archie in black & white removes the whole concern of his skin color. Many people held the opinion that the RF family didn’t support them, and it was sad to hear that confirmed.

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    1. THIS! -- "the institution was trying to leverage H&M into staying by not giving Archie a title or security , by cutting off money , by telling them Meghan should consider acting work , and to their credit they didn’t give in."

      Delete
  30. Amanda Gorman does it again 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
    “ They didn't just maltreat her light--they missed out on it.”
    “ But sometimes change, the decisions that bring us the most hurt, aren't about about happiness, but healing.”

    I hope that H&M find light and healing now that their truth is out ✌🏻

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  31. You did a wonderful job hitting the main points of the interview. I believe Diana sent Meghan to Harry because she knew he needed to get out because that life Is not a place where he could grow and thrive. When Meghan joined the family I was excited to see how great of a tool she could be for the monarchy but they missed a big opportunity they really needed. Wonderful interview. I want Meg to be my best friend. I would like to see more Archie photos (even just a yearly one) but I understand why they don’t. They both amaze me. And they have chickens?! How cool is that.

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  32. Thank you Charlotte - wonderful recap of a difficult interview.

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  33. Did Orpah Failed to ask one question (my recording failed with 10mins left) But if what they are saying is true then why in the world didnt they abdicate? Why would you still want to be involved or tied or linked to the a institution or firm that has treated you and your family this bad? I love the royal family, but if this is true then I would not want to be part of it and I would never use the titles and officially cut ties.

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    1. Why should they? We are merely faceless, curious fans of the royal family.

      Biggest check on reality is neither you or I are them nor do we own them. These people aren’t our playthings. They aren’t there to jump through our hoops in order to prove things to us.

      It’s their family and the family business. They are out of the family business, not the family.

      Delete
    2. This is only opinion: i think Harry still wants connection to his grandmother that way and it is his birth right. You can tell he hopes to connect again with Charles and Will but maybe he should also face that you can forgive people and move on from the family or not. Harry has been in this for 35 years, Meghan was trying to survive and take care of Archie (along with Harry). Harry is starting to see things differently and even more now that he is a father. This is only opinion not facts.

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    3. I may be mistaken, but one can only abdicate if you are next in line for the throne. So Charles could abdicate, but William could not.

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    4. I think you have to wait until you are on the throne to abdicate. It can’t be done in advance. There might be a separate process to remove yourself from the line of succession.

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    5. Abdication is totally for ones already sitting on the throne, not for sixth in line, that only get further from throne with years. But the poing is valid, why state they wanted to scale their roles and wanted still serve the Queen, if it was indeed that toxic and destructive. And there is no doubt it was unbearable for Meghan...

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  34. Where can I watch the interview in its entirety?

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    1. I'm sure it'll make it's way to youtube.

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  35. Unfortunately I cannot watch the interview after its airing as I do not have cable and in Canada free streaming is not possible. I hope that will change in time. Meanwhile, I thank you Charlotte for your continuous and sensitive coverage of Harry and Meghan. I am glad they have finally spoken out and shared their side of the story. Though it's wrenching to hear the appalling treatment by the family as well as the press, it's also heartening to learn how they are moving forward to forge a fresh life for themselves.

    So ironic and infuriating that with all the recent attention given to mental health initiatives (Heads Up etc) by royals, that help was denied to Meghan during her darkest hours and no statements on her behalf were made when others within the family have been shielded from press attention.

    I recall again the scene from The Crown with Charles and the Duchess of Windsor when he visits his uncle. He tells her that his family only want what's best for him, to which she replies, "No, they don't." I don't know why that particular line struck so forcefully, but it seemed fitting considering the subsequent maltreatment of Princess Margaret, Charles, Diana, Sarah and now Meghan and Harry.

    Just awful.

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    1. Have you checked CBS YouTube channel?

      Delete
  36. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 16:17

    I haven't been able to stop thinking about this interview. Many of us suspected how bad it was, but it was honestly so much worse than I think we imagined.

    Questioning how dark Archie's skin color would be? Denying Meghan help when she was in a mental health emergency? Refusing to support H&M in any way when it was so clear they were suffering, and then cutting them off in every way? I was sickened to hear it all. I'm still sickened. I have no love or respect left for much of the family or the institution.

    I thought Meghan handled the Kate issue well. She reiterated that she wasn't trying to disparage Kate and the fact that Kate did apologize. In my book, that's diplomatically setting the record straight.

    I wish there had been clarification about titles and security for Archie, because the discussion on the rules felt muddled. However, it is clear that there were concerns from the beginning over Meghan's race and then Archie's race before he was born that fueled discussions that probably wouldn't have existed had they both been white and British.

    I'm sure the press and trolls will jump on H&M for talking about their displeasure with being cut off from security and financials so quickly, but at this point, I'm over it. Those same people are probably always going to find things to disparage Meghan for. I'm just glad the Sussexes were finally able to share their side of the story and set the record straight.

    Frankly, I don't see how anyone could possibly (or why anyone would want to) defend the royals any longer. They have given far too much power to their toxic grey suits and the toxic UK press. Change needs to happen. I'm just not sure it will. At least Harry and Meghan are safe and are doing well. The birth of their daughter will surely feel like the start of a much brighter chapter.

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  37. I watched most of the additional interview this morning. Harry had told Oprah that he wanted it known that his grandmother and grandfather had NOT discussed Archie's potential skin color, which narrows the possibilities. Meghan talked about her father and step-sister, too. I was pretty much shocked at the whole interview. Just horrified that Meghan was suffering so greatly and nothing was to be done. One of my take-aways is that the working RF members are ruled by aides, courtiers, tradition -- whatever you want to call it. I no longer believe that any visits or initiatives are generated by the RF members, but rather planned by the people who are really in charge. Someone asked how Meghan was able to fly to the US for the shower and US Open -- maybe she requested her passport in advance and was allowed to go. I don't know. I believe what she said, though. I am glad to have the issue about the flower girls' dresses clarified -- as awful as it is that it happened, I think it's equally awful that Kate had to be wedding perfect a month after giving birth and could easily be in a tense state. I do not think it's acceptable to put out the lie about Meghan and then to not refute it. I am still pretty horrified and can't believe I can even write about it!! I believe Harry when he says they are all trapped. My basic thought, though, is shame on them all for treating Meghan like this and for the outrageous behavior displayed on their leaving. I remember soon after they left that William and Charles had a joint outing in which a lot of affection was shown. I'm afraid my attention is now on the Queen and H&M -- I do not care at all about the rest of them.

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    1. Agree. The misunderstanding between Kate and Meghan over bridesmaid dresses should have been kept private. Moreover it was already resolved. But someone dug it up leaked to the press months later and turned the story around making Meghan the villain. BP is running a very toxic PR machinery.

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    2. We can't excuse the Queen completely because she has the ultimate authority to overrule all her family and the Royal staff. The Sandringham meeting involved her plus Charles and William together with Harry. She had to approve whatever was decided. If, as some are saying, she is the only one supporting Harry and Meghan why was that statement issued about them not being able to be half in and half out? We cannot ignore that this latest interview is a serious threat to the British Monarchy and the Royal Family's position in the Commonwealth. Harry and Meghan surely must recognise that!

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  38. I sympathize with Meghan’s mental health struggle. I can’t even begin to imagine the stress she was and is still under. I think she was absolutely right for stepping down from her role in the Royal Family. And I think Harry was being an amazingly supportive husband in helping their whole family to do that.

    I don’t think the media (specifically those reporting negatively on Meghan- as those seem to be the ones at odds really) or the palace should be blamed for her struggles, however—not any of the actual family members or the people working to support and manage them. There are many reasons why I think that, but after writing them out, I realize they’re ultimately not important.

    Meghan is a real person who is clearly having very serious mental health struggles as a result of being a highly visible celebrity.

    I first came to madaboutmeghan for the clothes. I had followed the Duchess of Cambridge at HRH. I was inspired by Kate’s presence and the work she did and saw her as a role model that I looked to emulate in life and style, but her clothing style didn’t really fit me. Meghan’s did though; chic, more minimal. I loved her outfits! It seems like I was always shopping her style. I wore my Birdie’s loafers just this morning and have some Sugar lip treatment on the way. I then started identifying with her experiences (in my own way of course). I was going through a painful estrangement from a family member just as everything was coming out with Meghan and her dad. It was comforting to see I wasn’t alone as I didn’t have many people near to me that I felt I could really talk to. Maybe I could look to her experience for inspiration on how to handle my own. I was a near instant fan. I was excited to follow her; to read things written about her, to look for archived Tig articles, and even wonder “what would Meghan do.” But now I see, it’s imperative I stop all of that.

    This is a woman struggling, deeply struggling with being in the public eye. She needs privacy, but feels like she has to fight, has to do interviews and release public statements. Ultimately, I feel like I need to do my part (however tiny that may be) to help.

    I feel like its important for me to say goodbye to following Meghan. Just like Charlotte reiterated from another reader, “this isn’t what I signed up for.”

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    1. I would just like to say that she had no struggles until she entered that family. You want to absolve everyone of wrong doing and say she cannot handle her life when before marriage she had a thriving career in the 'public eye'. This is a thinly veiled stab at someone for having a crisis. I hope you never have anything like this happen to you or someone you know and if it does I hope you can show empathy instead trying to denigrate them as you have done here.

      Delete
    2. Meghan blames the palace for not helping her when she asked for help.
      Saying that she blames the palace and the UK press for her mental health issues is not accurate and twisted.

      Delete
    3. You are mistaken Jazzmom, Anon 16:38 did nothing of the sort to denigrate them, you are blind to the point. She is merely pointing out that to be a party to watch this pain continue makes us all a part of the circus, and she will no longer be a willing participant. Nothing denigrating about that at all, in fact I applaud her candor, as she no longer wishes to fuel the toxicity. Even reading these comments is exhausting and energy consumptive, sometimes we need to recognize what is toxic for all involved and move on.

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  39. As an American Anglophile I am bewildered by the hypocrisy of the family and institution representing themselves as patrons of organizations in support of mental health. How can you deny someone who is asking for help for the sake of the families image. Are we to assume as we watch the zoom calls that in fact they are just "working". Mental health has been perpetuated as the platform for much of the work of the younger generation. The unmitigated gall to constantly reference the importance of the Commonwealth knowing that the people who compromise the majority of nations are people of color yet to speak the words of concern about the skin color of a future generation of the family. Has the institution not heard the phrase, Black Lives Matter. My take away is that the so called family are merely puppets of the institution, its all just a big show that has been perpetuated for so many generations that there is no exit available or most likely the extraordinary life style afforded them is more important then their pride.

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  40. I live in Canada...a Commonwealth country. I’m Black. My husband is white. My son is biracial. If the British royal family can’t see the harm they’re doing by their response to Meghan and Harry then I don’t really see a future for the Commonwealth. My reality looks more like Meghan and Harry than anyone else in the royal family. They need to fix this.

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  41. I guessed the interview would be juicy, but HOLY COW!!!
    I'm glad they are out of there, are happy and safe, and Congratulations on the Baby GIRL!!!

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  42. Thank you for this article, Charlotte, and for your previous one. I’ve been too busy in my personal life and too overwhelmed with emotion about all this to formulate a response.

    I’m in shock about so many revelations in the interview. I feel a little gut-punched, and just sorting through the fog for some reasoned thoughts about a few things.

    (I’m sorry for all the exclamation points in my post, but they reflect how gobsmacked I am by these revelations.)

    I was shocked, and yet not surprised, that Meghan’s psyche would go to such a dark place. She had lost the relationship with her father, which she held dear. Her own family members were on a crusade to bring her down. She had given up her entire life and everything familiar to be “locked” in the palace -- all her freedom and independence removed, including her ability to continue the close and supportive relationships with her many loving friends. How she must have ached for the support of their presence! She was being lied about continually, with no one coming to her defense, after they had promised to protect her!

    It is beyond hypocritical that a family who publicly crusades for mental health, encouraging people to speak up and get help when they need it, would deny that help to one of their own members when she tells them she is suicidal! ! ! ! ! Because it wouldn’t “look good” for the institution! ! ! ! !

    What kind of rot exists at the foundation of this institution???

    The next most shocking thing that sticks out for me is the glaring reality that the monarchy has no power! ! ! They live in fear of the unconscionable tabloids! ! ! I think it was Harry who said in the interview that no one in the family spoke up for them because they feared the tabloids would turn on them, too! ! ! ! I am speechless!

    What is the point of an institution that puts on such a show of morality and fairness and all things noble, who underneath all that facade, is totally beholden to pleasing a vicious press? ? ? ?

    The other thing that was validated for me, though Harry stopped short of saying it, is that when Meghan and Harry’s popularity surpassed that of any other royal during the Australian tour, and Meghan’s great ease and charisma with the public outshown other royals, it seemed the tide changed and she had to be brought down. There was jealousy. The spares outshining the heirs could not be tolerated.

    R

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    1. @R - your last statement, is the key to it all (IMHO). And it came from Harry's perspective. Meghan had just announced her pregnancy, their first Royal Tour, and how the Commonwealth countries accepted and related to her. Not to mention, her speeches and ability speech eloquently (sharing her voice).

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    2. R, so agree. Remember how the tour was railroaded at the end by the splitting of the two households?

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  43. The conflict between people and what people are capable of in institutions is difficult. We've seen what otherwise good people will do to protect say the Catholic church as a member of that institution. Or an elected representative may be completely warm and welcoming on a personal basis, but the vote as a member of a political party without that empathy shown on a person basis. Protecting Meghan required risk because to the tabloid backlash that would have resulted even though doing so would have long-term benefits for the monarchy on a global level no one was was willing to risk political capital they might need for themselves. When someone is being assaulted in the street most everyone will feel sorry for that person, but fee people will actually risk themselves to step in and defend the person. There's a difference between someone acknowledges racism is wrong and someone who is actually an ally.

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  44. Charlotte, Didn't Harry talk about writing 3 letters? One when dating, one when married (I think have to rewatch), and on when Meghan was pregnant?

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  45. Nicole from France8 March 2021 at 17:55

    Thank you Charlotte , for writing such clear and calm though very concerned posts , We are supposed to watch the interview in France this evening , I shall certainly do , although I have already a good idea of what was said, thanks to you , and some moments I could catch on the internet .
    Again I feel sad for H & M , who were willing to give the best of their personality and workforce to the BRF .....
    I won’t say much about that , just 5wo th8ngs :
    Kathe and , in a lesser way William , have been advocating for years in favour of psychological help for children , young girls and boys , pregnant women, young mothers , bringing the attention of the public on these matters . Apparently they did not , for a second , thought they had two persons in dire need in their family . How shall I believe them now when they smile and make speeches ? That will just be words , words , words .....
    Her Majesty has been addressing to the Commonwealth people yesterday , did she (and all her courtiers and helpers) realize that a large part of these people have dark skin ? So how do they actually consider them ? And how will these people now receive all the beautifull words the Queen used ? How will these people feel , seeing that the very woman they consider as a model has denied (or has let people around her do it ) any compassion to one of them ?
    Such a waste ....
    I do hope H & M and their family will be able to get through , despite all the pain and suffering .
    And I want to believe that , eventually , the firm will stop fiddling around with authorized leaks .....

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    1. Harry and Meghan said they went to the "institution" about her mental health, not the family. In fact, they clarify throughout that the family and the institution are distinct entities. And Harry says he never spoke about their mental health issues with his family members. So to say that William and Kate ignored Meghan's please is to ignore what Meghan and Harry actually said. She says in the interview that she went to Human Resources for help. William and Kate are not human resources, she's talking about going to palace aides. I think there's plenty of blame for the family on other issues brought up but suggesting Harry's brother and sister in law didn't care about Meghan's mental health when that was never said is wrong.

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  46. Fist of all...to the good news: so happy it's a baby girl! I wish Meghan a healthy and safe delivery. Now...to the heavy stuff: it's clear to me that there's only one way to get out of this situation, the royal family need to take a good hard look at the royal household, their staff and aides and figure out who's unfit to work for an institution that's supposed to represent all people of all ethnicities and backgrounds. And last but definitely not least the members of the royal family who have unconscious or conscious racial bias - as you can tell from that one unnamed royal who was fretting over Archie's possible dark skin tone - need to admit and apologise to the Sussexes even privately and do the work of unlearning racial prejudice and their racist tendencies not only because they're supposed to represent all people in a multicultural country such as the UK and all the other commonwealth countries whose population is mainly made of Poc but also if they want to mantain a relationship with not just Harry and Meghan but also their children who'll one day see and learn all that transpired during these times.

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  47. Am I the only one that isn’t shocked by the interview? It sounds pretty much as what I expected?
    Meghan underestimated what her new reality would be like, Harry definitely missed to prepare her. The family is NOT the Brady Bunch. The British press is a pitbull.
    Harry seems also be blinded by the his status of Golden Boy that he held for years. His children were never privy to a title, till Charles ascends the throne. Not working royals have gotten their security finances cut.
    There is a lot of alluding and implications but I find there were surprisingly little hard facts.
    The wedding before the wedding for example. They had a sweet ceremony, just the two of them. A vow exchange but they were not “already married”. That’s a fact. So a surprise but no shocker.
    There are some plot holes in their story. Which is fine, it’s their take on it but also changes the picture if you didn’t catch onto it.

    all in all- I don’t think the interview did anything for their future but maybe gave them closure? They definitely have come a long way from their first exit statement (where they wanted very much stay part of the whole show) to this interview. All in all it charges nothing. I don’t think anyone changes their mind, nor do I think anyone has found a new strong interest in the royal world.
    C.

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    1. Absolutely spot on

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    2. I'm so glad you said this! I was surprised at how little she claimed to know. When she said she didn't know you have to curtsey to the queen behind closed doors or when she thought Archie would get a title, I mean, I'm an American too but if I knew of those things then how in the world did she not?
      Meghan S

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    3. caroline in montana8 March 2021 at 21:54

      Agree 10000000% with you both!

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    4. I agree, thank you for your comment. That Meghan was hurt, that they are racists members of the RF, I have no doubt and I think this should be addressed.
      However I cannot believe she was that naive. Maybe, had she been 19 yrs old like Diana or had she not known fame before, but it's certainly not her case.
      Entering the Royal Family cannot be anything but hard, because it's an institution that is so much above oneself that, of course, we might feel we are disappearing.
      What also saddens me is that accusations were made that cannot be denied or confirmed by the other side because of what the other side represents. And the accusations are vague, most of the times, naming no one, meaning that everyone from the royal family is suspect with no possibility to clear their name.

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    5. Plenty of people don’t know this. Just because you do. I’d think as an American I wouldn’t even have to curtsy and it was strictly a British thing. We’re on a page where people are used to discussions the Royal Family and maybe assuming what we know is common knowledge, but I promise you far more Americans have zero clue of the details, and Meghan could have easily been this type before meeting Harry.

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    6. I haven't looked at the whole interview as I have enough drama in my own family. Very few families are entirely friction free. The only difference is that not all have members who use the news media to get their own back. Some family counselling, maybe with a mediator, might have helped at an earlier stage but it is probably too late for that. I don't think I will be looking at this blog again. It is too emotionally exhausting!

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    7. Anonymous 22:39 - I am pretty sure many new or not even really big royal watchers don't know this. Fact is, if you had been watching for some years you would know. It is public knowledge and we get at least one tabloid christmas article per year about how much Kate hates to curtsy to Bea and Eugenie and the other way round when Wiliam is present.
      Thing is: no one here is about to marry into this family. Even if she thought she would just figure thingsout- it was Harry's job to prepare her. The fact, that she had to turn to Fergie (supportive of Andrew till this day Fergie) for help is just so strange.

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  48. New Picture of the family of four: https://www.instagram.com/p/CMKrsFlAIfa/

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    1. Thanks, Maria. Beautiful photo. So wonderful to see Meghan so happy and loved.

      R

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  49. I’ve been feeling guilty for sometime now. Perhaps I’m part of the problem by consuming too much of this type of entertainment. As they say, there wouldn’t be a drug epidemic if there wasn’t such a big consumer market.

    I call this whole thing entertainment because the so call “news” is rifed with speculations and lies and using the word news doesn’t fit here. The journalism standard in the reporting of the royals by news outlets isn’t to inform, but to form public opinion and incite emotions in order to orchestrate a hit reality show...all for public entertainment.

    I wonder about the health of this family. Why not cut ties with the royal rota? Stop hobnobbing at annual palace Christmas party, stop making personal phone calls as palace insiders to chat with tabloid reporting friends while having a “no comment” policy. The system is a revolving door between the palace, PR firms and Fleet Street. Perhaps there are too many skeletons that would get unearthed should the royals cut ties. If so, this is living life as a hostage and a horrible legacy to leave to future Windsor generations. Who’s next to be media fodder? No wonder there is profound family dysfunction.

    There is institutional racism within the media world, but the news organizations are unwilling to look deep and reform. The Society of Editors (association of UK press) awarded the Daily Mail “newspaper of the year” award in 2016 (the DM articles leading up to Brexit targeted Muslims and foreigners viciously) rejected that the UK press could possibly be bigoted after the Oprah’s interview. Take a look at who head these news organizations? Rich, white old men. The system is set up to make profit and acquire power. These people are given medals, knighted, and sit as heads of government ministries. Racism is institutionalized.

    There is a cultural war going on. It’s a war pitting the young vs. the old, the north vs the south, the empire vs the former colonies, and white England vs multicultural England. The words used in this battle are microaggression, causal racism, woke culture, cancel culture and snowflakes. The phrase double standards is left out getting dusty, but it’s hypocrisy that gets top billing as applied to Meghan.

    For me, as a mixed race person, whose family was brought from one colony to another to labor the land, it’s frustrating to watch the ugly history continues and the refusal by white anglos to listen, to take responsibility and more importantly, to reform. The Commonwealth is a prop. I am not the only one who has mixed feelings about the set up. It feels wrong to have a celebration where performers are dressed up in indigenous clothes to perform for people whose current policies and treatments put people like me in the back of the bus and vilified us as dirty “foreigners”, even in one’s own country. Frustrated and angry at people who deny racism and by doing so refuse to address the racism they inflict on people who must live it.

    Meghan’s experience shows as famous and titled as she was, she wasn’t safe from the racism and the misogyny. I read the petty, mean and racist things they wrote and said about her these last 3 years.You can’t erase them.

    BTW, I think the misogyny that these women faced as royal newcomers highlights the entrenched bullying and sexism within the British press and the royal household. It shows you can have a country with a queen and still treat women badly.

    -Upset and frustrated


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    1. Very well said. Especially this " Meghan’s experience shows as famous and titled as she was, she wasn’t safe from the racism and the misogyny."

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  50. Fascinating interview. The CBS morning show continues the conversation with more clips and a discussion with Oprah. I need a couple of clarifications:

    1. "Tabloids" are these the same as what we refer to as tabloids here in the US? i.e.: we have many newspapers - which are credible although sometimes biased - and tabloids (or rags) which are known to 'fabricate' stories. My opinion and not the point around why I'm asking for the clarification. I'm trying to understand why the RF cares about 'tabloids' and "needs them". Do Brits view the tabloids as credible? I googled Piers Morgan this morning (given there was a reference to him always working to make Meghan a 'villain' and his comments this morning on GMB are shocking.

    2. "Who" is the firm or institution? I'd like to know who these folks actually are. How many people are on salary? Meghan mentioned the HR person. In a clip, when Harry mentions his Personal Secretary, Meghan says, "that's like the CEO of the business." Clearly these are the people stating to PC, PH, etc. "don't do that, it'll look like this." Or the reverse. They are advisors? Or strategists?

    Oh and one more point, Meghan mentions "no training". What are other's thoughts on that?

    Elle

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    1. I think the Tabloids in the UK are somewhat the same as here, in that they spread false stories. But here those tabloids are only sold at supermarket counters and are not widely read. But It seems in the UK there are so many of them and much more widely paid attention to, than here.
      The firm or institution are “courtiers”, aides, men in gray suits, who run the royal offices and are charged with maintaining centuries old traditions and advising the family on what has always been done in the past. The family seems to follow these traditions and doesn’t have the fortitude to try to change things.
      No training?? Harry could and should have set that up for her if she wanted training in royal protocol.



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    2. They are similar to what we call tabloids in the USA. But I think there’s this symbiotic relationship as Harry mentioned where it’s these magazines and newspapers that really consistently cover the RF. So there’s a bit of a codependency on each other. I think more serious news newspapers (The Guardian) etc do occasionally cover the royal family but it’s not generally a priority of theirs. So they don’t need the RF for clicks and the RF doesn’t need them for coverage. The NY Times in America covered the interview and has covered big royal stories but not at all daily. The Mail etc have a daily narrative about royals and irs almost like they’ve cast them in this show that they then manipulate for their audience. There has to be a good guy bad guy, there had to be controversy or scandal, drama must always be maintained. And it’s too bad because when the line is crossed it’s not entertainment it’s impacting people’s lives.

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  51. Hello Charlotte, I have been following this blog from the beginning and I want to thank you for the extreme sensitivity you have in telling us about all this (as well as for the great accuracy of each of your posts), I am really close to Harry and Meghan, I can not believe they have passed for all of this. Now I wanted to ask you a question, because I'm afraid I have not understood a thing, I have always believed that Archie, at the time of his birth did not yet have the right to the title of prince but only to the accessory of Harry that is Earl of Dumbarton but at the time of the death of the Queen would automatically be called Prince Archie of Sussex and that it was Harry and Meghan who chose to "free" him from this burden ... so that's not the case and I always thought wrong?
    Diane

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  52. From my understanding, the reason Princess Anne’s children are not prince or princess is because Anne is a female. Andrew’s kids are princesses and Edwards kids could have the titles, but Edward declined.

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  53. It seems the people in charge knew Meghan's megawatt personality and charisma would outshine others, and she was advised (warned):

    "In 2018 she [Meghan] had just joined the Royal Family. She shared a conversation with me then that really made me feel somewhat disheartened because she said she'd been told, been given advice, that it would be best if she could be 50% less than she was. That was the quote," said Oprah.

    How could anyone survive like that?

    Now, they get to be their authentic selves, not lessoning themselves to please someone else. What a relief!

    R

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    1. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:24

      How disturbing was that quote?! It basically confirms what Harry stopped short of saying, which was that there was, in fact, jealousy over how brightly Meghan was shining, especially on their tours.

      Delete
  54. Maria, that is a gorgeous photo!!!!

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  55. I may be wasting my time writing this comment, because it seems that not many get published unless they show great adoration for Meghan. Let me start by saying that there are many things I admire about both Meghan and Harry and I think they could have contributed greatly to the work of the monarchy. I did not consider, however, this Oprah interview to be totally fair, because it only presented one side of the story. Harry said many times how much he respects the Queen and yet, so much of the interview trashed the royal family, of which the Queen is head. Oprah never addressed why Meghan has zero contact with her own family other than her mother. I don't just mean her father and half siblings who have suspect behaviour, I also mean all the others on both sides. To have invited the black relatives to the wedding would have shown great pride in the contributions they made to Meghan's life.

    I don't believe that Meghan could not receive help for her suicidal thoughts. She was seeing a doctor(s) regularly regarding her pregnancy and if she had said anything, their oath would have meant they would definitely get her assistance. Both Harry and Prince Charles have spoken about their own counselling and therapy, so it is not true that this would look wrong for the "institution." If it was not possible for Meghan to leave to visit a mental health clinician, one could come to her, or it could be done over an online or internet connection. We are not speaking about a young child, powerless to reach out. Meghan was not locked in the tower, with no contact to the outside world.

    Many claims were made about the institution, the Firm, etc. but without being specific, the claims were how Meghan and Harry perceived it. There have been mistakes made on all sides and it is a pity they were aired by Meghan and Harry now and they were aired in public. I fear that this has only expanded the divide within the family. The only ones who came out ahead were Oprah, Harpo Productions and CBS.

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    1. Elizabeth, there are obviously reasons that Meghan did not invite other family members to her wedding, and, to her credit, we do not know the reasons. I believe Meghan wanted to check into a facility, not just speak with a therapist. There have been claims made for several years about H&M with no response -- this is their side, after hearing the other side for way too long.

      Delete
    2. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:28

      Oh boy. Piers Morgan said he didn't believe Meghan, either...are you sure you want to go down that same road? Why would Meghan lie about that?

      The Queen is the head of the firm, but it's abundantly clear by now that she most definitely is not the one really running things. Also, it *is* entirely possible to separate the Queen and even other members of the family from the institution (the grey suits), which, if you were listening, is exactly what both Harry and Meghan did. When Harry said that not one of his family publicly supported them for the onslaught of racist coverage against his wife, that's simply the truth. HOWEVER, he even went on to say he still loves his father and brother and is still making it a priority to heal that relationship.

      Delete
    3. I don’t appreciate your swipe at Charlotte about what comments get published. She’s always been clear she won’t tolerate abusing or name calling comments but encourages discussion. I think the comments tend to be about 50/50 so I really don’t believe your assertion all are adoring about Meghan. I’ve just read several in a row right this very minute that were critical or Meghan or the interview.

      Meghan’s mother’s side of the family is far more private. We don’t know much about them and don’t need to. You’re really making some outlandish assertions about who she has had contact with and who was invited to the wedding and why. None of those people are public figures and may be choosing to be unknown, but you don’t know anything about what goes on in her private family life with her mother’s side. It’s obviously being kept that way for a reason, and you don’t have a right to that information. Harry’s side are all public figures and frankly were fair game for this interview because they are discussing why they had to leave the royal family.

      As far as her mental health needs I think people are being far too simplistic here. Of course she had a doctor and likely could have received immediate help, but then what? they are indicating the situation had become dire and needed to be addressed in both the short and long term and there was a concern (correctly as it turns out) that this need for help would go unfulfilled. There are layers and filters to what royal family members can do and what it looks like and how it plays in the press and who ultimately decides. This isn’t exactly a bombshell in the interview, family members have been alluding to this going back decades. Would they have let her die? No I don’t think so. We’re they receptive to the larger problem (crisis even?) no I also don’t think so. Both thinks can be true and the situation is more complicated than some commenters are making it with these “of course she could have called her doctor” assertions.

      Delete
    4. You know, not everyone is blessed with a large extended family. Meghan was raised as a single child, as she said in the extended interview. Her father's side of the family seems to want to live off disparaging her. And on Doria's side, I believe she was very close with her maternal grandmother but her grandmother has since passed away. As for the rest, who exactly are you talking about? And how do YOU know whether these nameless people have contributed to her life in any meaningful way?

      I don't really understand why people insist on making Meghan's family situation a test of her character, when nobody has any control over what family they are born into? SO many people deal with difficult upbringings and need to cut out toxic family members for their own mental health.

      I don't think your doubts about Meghan's mental health crisis are really worth addressing, since you have no more firsthand knowledge of that situation than you do of Meghan's familial relationships. All I'll say is that I can see where being hospitalized for suicidal ideation might be (VERY wrongly) seen as more "scandalous" than just going to counseling/therapy, from the perspective of an archaic institution.

      Delete
  56. Interesting interview. I feel for both Megan and Harry and wish them the best. Some of the interview came across as sincere and with thoughtful comments, some of it begged for the other side to be heard and sadly some of it concerned me that they both at almost 40 really seemed immature. I blame some of it on the two of them not recognizing how fast their lives were changing and how emotional and stressful a new marriage, being pregnant, being parents can be. Were there issues, of course, but it is probably more nuanced and complicated then said in the interview both better and worse.

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    1. Umm three years of being criticized and lied about daily in multiple presses while trying to do your job is not about immaturity!

      Seriously, this is about racism and sexism. The double standards is why we have civil
      rights laws in some countries to protect people so they aren’t discriminated against or exploited.

      You can bet Racism and misogyny are stressful to the human soul. Abuse does that to people.

      It seems the royal press can dish it out, but can’t take the heat or responsibility. That’s pretty immature in my book.

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    2. I blame it on racism. Plain and simple.

      Delete
  57. C. Good for you to point out that there are two sides to every story. I've done so in the past and my comments have not been published, so I am glad you got through and I wonder if I will. You are correct in saying that Archie was not privy to a title. Anne's children aren't HRH, neither are Edward's. Princess Margaret's two children were never a prince or princess. As far as security goes, the York sisters, who are princesses do not receive security paid from the pubic purse. The royal family has an entire team of highly specialized doctors and Meghan could have received help from any one of them. Both Meghan and Harry made accusations, but didn't name names. Which makes them no different than the tabloids that mention "a source" The saddest thing is that this interview has really further divided the family. The Crown will prevail as it has with many "scandals" in the past. It is a pity that it has all come to this. Meghan and Harry had great potential, which was never realized.

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    1. In the interview, when Charles becomes king, Archie would automatically get the prince status and protection. That status was changed for Archie. The 2 princesses (Eugenia and Beatrice) had royal protections until recently.



      Delete
    2. Clearly, you do not understand the system. Do you think Harry would have stop her from getting help if it was available?

      Do you know that they were not allowed to show Archie the way Kate showed her children on the steps?

      Do you understand that the removed Meghan's name from Archie certificate?
      Do you understand that at one time they took away her US passport?
      Do you understand that Meghan was told to cut back 50% of self after her oceana tour?
      Do you understand that the way she was treated internally changed drastically after the tour?
      Do you understand that the press and the BRF knew Thomas was not going to attend the wedding before Meghan knew because he lied to her?

      Do you know that Meghan and Eugenie were friends before Harry met Meghan?
      Do you know that Eugenie, Harry Meghan and Jack double-dated in Toronto when they visited Meghan - Now you understand that Meghan making pregnancy announcement at her wedding does not make sense.

      The two sides is the LIES we were fed and the TRUTH that is now arriving

      Delete
    3. Princess Margaret’s children didn’t get prince or princess designation because their mom wasn’t queen and their grandmother wasn’t queen.

      It’s an odd thing to be sure but I think it’s important if there’s aboutism used, it’s accurate.

      Meghan asked for all help but was told it would make the institution look bad. That was a no. This is the palace that leaks like a sieve when it comes to all things Meghan.

      The “source” is different because it’s anonymous. Here it’s Meghan and Harry’s firsthand experience with that unnamed person.

      You can doubt their words that’s fine. But to believe a tabloid report from a palace insider leak and not them...seems a bit odd.

      The biggest proof is the unrelentless negative UK headlines for the last 3 years. Even now there are royal experts who are trying to explain away an inquiry about a baby’s skin color as the same as speculating about hair color and that it’s probably a generational thing.

      Look I guess maybe it’s the norm in the UK
      that allows lurid speculations regarding one’s paternal parentage to make money. In my country, it’s an insult and it’s not called news. Maybe in the UK, it’s all one big joke. But you know what, I’m grateful that a parent step thing and say yeah, it’s no ok. It’s not ok to make jokes about chimpanzees and my child AND then pull away his security without adequate warning. Knowing there’s a media frenzy about him.

      When you dehumanize a person, a newborn to a chimpanzee, it’s easy for people to treat that person less than human. So that people can joke about it. This is a desirable family value?

      That I have to explain this given what we see in the news and the tortuous history of colonialism tells me this is a world that still has a long way to go. It’s a world where we’ll see more injustices and people who are marginalized and exploited. People, turns out, are still a commodity for sale.

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    4. Princess Margaret’s children didn’t get prince or princess designation because their mom wasn’t queen and their grandmother wasn’t queen.

      It’s an odd thing to be sure but I think it’s important if there’s aboutism used, it’s accurate.

      Meghan asked for all help but was told it would make the institution look bad. That was a no. This is the palace that leaks like a sieve when it comes to all things Meghan.

      The “source” is different because it’s anonymous. Here it’s Meghan and Harry’s firsthand experience with that unnamed person.

      You can doubt their words that’s fine. But to believe a tabloid report from a palace insider leak and not them...seems a bit odd.

      The biggest proof is the unrelentless negative UK headlines for the last 3 years. Even now there are royal experts who are trying to explain away an inquiry about a baby’s skin color as the same as speculating about hair color and that it’s probably a generational thing.

      Look I guess maybe it’s the norm in the UK
      that allows lurid speculations regarding one’s paternal parentage to make money. In my country, it’s an insult and it’s not called news. Maybe in the UK, it’s all one big joke. But you know what, I’m grateful that a parent step thing and say yeah, it’s no ok. It’s not ok to make jokes about chimpanzees and my child AND then pull away his security without adequate warning. Knowing there’s a media frenzy about him.

      When you dehumanize a person, a newborn to a chimpanzee, it’s easy for people to treat that person less than human. So that people can joke about it. This is a desirable family value?

      That I have to explain this given what we see in the news and the tortuous history of colonialism tells me this is a world that still has a long way to go. It’s a world where we’ll see more injustices and people who are marginalized and exploited. People, turns out, are still a commodity for sale.

      Delete
    5. Becca in Colorado8 March 2021 at 22:31

      The other side of the story was played out in the Daily Mail, which the palace did nothing to correct.

      I really wish people were forced to use a moniker instead of hiding behind "anonymous."

      Delete
    6. You could do your research first before stating things conclusively maybe? The fact is, Archie should be entitled to a title once Charles becomes king, under the 1917 King George V Letters Patent (as a male-line grandchild of the monarch). Meghan referenced this decree specifically, and she also stated that they were looking at changing the existing rules for Archie. So the implication is that he would not get a title when Charles becomes king, even though he is currently entitled to one.

      Also, saying "the royal family has an entire team of highly specialized doctors and Meghan could have received help from any one of them" is pretty wild, when Meghan stated the exact opposite. Do you think she's lying about her suicidal ideation? Or about asking for help? And if so, why?

      Delete
    7. It's my understanding that titles are passed down the male line. In order for Anne's children to inherit titles, her husband would have to be given a title to pass down. Edward's children technically have HRH's which they do not use, but to which they are entitled because they are the children of a male. It's all very patriarachal. I'm not sure about the discussion about Archie and titles. I understand that Meghan seemed to be saying that Archie, because he is not entitled at present to HRH, would not get any protection which are afforded HRH's. But I'm not sure whether Meghan was saying that discussions were under way to prevent Archie from eventually get an HRH when Charles became king, but for that to happen, there would have to be new letters patent I think. That change then would technically affect the children of Charlotte and Louis in the future. Otherwise, it would appear that they would be making an except for the mixed race children only.

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    8. I'm going to share something very personal here, Elizabeth, in the hopes that specifics from someone's life will help you understand since you are asking for the gory details. I have been going through infertility treatments and recently lost a pregnancy. I go to one of the top hospitals in the U.S. After three horrific years and a second pregnancy loss, I, like Meghan, began have suicidal ideation in the middle of the night. My husband had no idea. He was right beside me, asleep. After many nights of this (and the way Meghan described it exactly mirrors my experience in terms of the clarity and persistence of the thoughts), I got up, snuck into the guest room and called the emergency number for our clinic. We have been working with a fantastic psychologist there for a year now, so I have both medical doctors and a mental health expert in my chart, on my case--all the things that you claim a girl needs. The doctor on call said that psychologists are not on call in the middle of the night and that they would forward my message. My next appointment wasn't for 2 weeks, and when I told them what was going on, I got through to a scheduler, who said my psychologist was booked solid, even for emergencies. So, on the surface, I have both physical and mental healthcare at one of the best hospitals in the country, but when in crisis could not be put through to anyone who could help me. OB/GYNs aren't trained for that and doctors are very careful for liability reasons to not work outside of their specialty, so even though I had the on-call doctor on the phone, she ultimately ended up recommending that I call the standard suicide hotline. Which I did because it was the only option. So having a doctor only goes so far in the middle of the night. Maybe release some of that arrogance you have that you know other people's lives better than they and that you could problem solve better than them. Happy International women's Day to you, Elizabeth.

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    9. Harry and M<eghan could certainly afford to pay for a private counsellor and didn't need to go to the Palace HR person to get one. Why would you do that when you are also accusing the Palace staff of leaking falsehoods against you? Meghan is an intelligent person and I can't believe she had no other options even if Harry was too inept to help her.

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    10. Anon 4:53 thank you for sharing your very painful experience. You said it better than anyone could. I hope you are feeling better now.

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    11. Anon @ 4:53 I'm so sorry to hear about that horrible experience. Thank you for being brave enough to post it hear to shed some light on the situation with Meghan. Wishing you the best in your fertility journey.

      Alicia

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  58. I also haven’t been able to get this interview off my mind. One of the things she said that surprised me was that she didn’t really have any training or direction on what to do in her role, at engagements, etc. I just assumed there would be this “Duchess Training” team, and, I’m ashamed to admit that I thought she wasn’t playing by the book intentionally sometimes to shake things up. (It’s laughable now, but I couldn’t believe she wore pants to give her first speech. Pants! You just don’t DO that! *eye roll*) I see now that she really had no idea what she was getting into, and was ready to do everything “right” had it been instructed to her. I now have more respect than ever, knowing she was just mastering it on her own - and slaying it! I feel like, once again this year, assumptions I have been making about the world are wrong.

    I’d like to make a comment in defense of Will and Kate. When Meghan said something to the effect of “you don’t know what’s actually going on in people’s lives,” let’s think of these two for a moment. Yes, now Meghan has been able to share her truth and we know her experience. But what about Kate and Will? Has it occurred to anyone that they’ve been silenced too? We have NO idea what Kate has had to *not* say because she is the mother of the future King. The stakes are even higher for her. Perhaps Kate wanted to set things straight, but clearly isn’t allowed to. And how could she break the rules? Maybe she wanted to reach out more but was forbidden too. There are probably things even Meghan and Harry don’t know. And we’ll never know, because she will not be sharing her truth. I’ve learned to assume nothing. Let’s share a little light and compassion their way today too.
    - Janice M

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    1. Yet she can have denials issued over her Botox and hair extensions...

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  59. Elizabeth

    I would further add that if a comparison is being made as to who is and is not getting titles then Archie should be compared to his generation which is Mia and Lena Tisdale, Autumn Brooksbank and Isla and Savannah Phillips. Correct me if I am wrong but None of them have titles. There were many articles on this prior to his birth that explained the rules.

    I agree with your comment Elizabeth that this is only one side of the story.

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    1. Right but when Charles becomes king Archie would be entitled to HRH and Prince per the letters patent Meghan referenced. At that point Archie’s grandfather is king and he is a grandchild in the male line. He would not be comparable to his cousins Mia and Lena, August, Isla, and Savannah he WOULD be comparable to his cousins George, Charlotte and Louis as the 4 (soon to be 5) grandchildren of the monarch. Meghan is saying they were told that plans were being put into motion to deny that from happening. This didn’t come across clearly in the interview because this letters patent thing is confusing and the older generations are staying alive way longer than I’m sure was ever intended by those letters (ie they never accounted for great grandchildren of the monarch, which all the littlest cousins are currently,). But her issue wasn’t with his status NOW it was with them being told what had been the protocol for 100 years would be ending with Archie and she didn’t understand and wasn’t told why, and what she seemed most bothered by was the implications to his security and safety with that decision. I think she also implied they were basically obligated to participate in a press narrative that they chose this for Archie when it sounds like there was a lot of dictates going on about what would happen. And before anyone mentions it Prince Edward’s children are entitled to HRH and Prince and Princess under these same letters and are equivalent to their cousins William and Harry, and Beatrice and Eugenie as grandchildren of the monarch in the male lines, their parents Edward and Sophie opt to not use these titles for them. (Princess Anne’s children were never entitled to it due to her being female. Her first husband was offered a title which could be passed down that they could have used but he declined) I hope this helps clarify!

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    2. None of those children you listed will ever be male-line grandchildren of the monarch, which is what Archie will be when Charles is king.

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    3. Harry is the second son so is not in the direct line of succession. It would require five people to die or step down before there is any possibility of him becoming king. And he has said he doesn't want to be part of the senior royal family and that his father and brother are trapped by their positons. So why is Meghan so upset about Archie's title (which they can't use in USA anyway.) In fact Meghan and Harry strictly speaking should just be Mr and Mrs Mountbatten Windsor.

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    4. According to the George V's Letter Patent being referred here, only George is entitled to be HRH, even Charlotte and Louis are not entitled to HRH, so the Queen issued an LP in 2013 to make all William's children HRH. She didn't issue the same for Harry.

      Also, titles are mainly only passed down through male line. At the time of their birth, Charles & Anne were not entitled to be HRH because their father Prince Philip was not a Prince of the UK at that time. George VI issued an LP for Charles & Anne to be styled HRH. By the time Andrew and Edward were born, the Queen was already the Monarch so Andrew and Edward did not need an LP to be HRHs.

      After this interview, I am going not going to assume that Edward chose not use the HRH for his children, or that Anne's husband was offered a title and she declined. Maybe it was reported like that and they couldn't refute it.

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    5. @Anonymous 23:31: I think you mjight be onto something. Sadly, this was not what came theough in the interview. Be it by editing or because it is complicated to explain. I can only say, that Archie and his respective children NEVER holding an HRH, while not the rule atm, was very much expected for years. The talks of the streanlined monrachy always have involved a cut after Harry- at least in the royal watcher scene. Charlotte and Louis will loose their titles at one point too. Many see that as a given. I am always amazed that Harry seeme to be surprised by those consequences, when this is not only openly discused by (a very informed scene out there) but also when he looks at all the other European monarchies.

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  60. Having just watched the interview, I feel confused about it, I feel that Meghan facts are muddled and the events not exactly in a proper time line. I think she is feeling very hurt by her experience, I think her perception of what happened to her is very painful and bitter. I’m not exactly sure it makes sense, why couldn’t she assess help ? She had a personal doctor and didn’t need anyone to arrange this for her? Also , the discussion on Archie getting a title doesn’t make sense.
    However, I do think the institution is outdated and that they have a total lack of understanding of racism. I also think what was said by Harry about the relationship between the press and the family is very telling. The PR machine did nothing to help Meghan and by all accounts were leaking negative stories about her. The Royal Family is primarily made up of elderly sheltered aristocratic’s, with no real understanding of modern life. They had no idea how to handle an independent American mixed race women. Why wasn’t Charles getting involved and helping his son and daughter-in-law? He seems to be sleep walking through this . Why was he not trying to find a solution to this ? It’s all sad and messy. Sinead

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  61. I hope this interview will be a source of closure for Meghan and Harry and that they can move forward. Even though it was painful for them to leave when they hoped to do so much good with their positions, they were clearly in an abusive relationship with the palace. Though I can see her point of view about being disappointed and frightened that Archie would not get a title and protection, it’s probably a good thing so that he can grow up in America as a somewhat normal kid. There is much potential for them to have a happy and healthy life ahead and perhaps keep their children safe from this very poisonous royal family. As an American, I’m glad to have them here. We will definitely benefit from Meghan’s compassionate heart.

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  62. I saw the interview in its entirety and the air was completely sucked out of my living room! I was flabbergasted by their candor because it was my presumption that this interview would primarily focus on the racist, misogynistic treatment of Meghan by the British Press. Instead, this was a scathing repudiation of the Firm and its complicity in these vicious attacks.

    Sadly, I am not surprised by the racism that Meghan experienced, nor was I surprised by her, or Harry's for that matter, naivete regarding what it meant to be a working Royal or to be married into the British Royal Family. As I watched the events of the wedding unfold, I kept thinking to myself, "She is going into this eyes wide shut!" Still, there is no excuse for the bullying Meghan experienced in the press and to some degree by the Firm.

    Lastly, although there are three sides to every story: yours, theirs, and then the truth, the racism that Meghan experienced is all too familiar to me as a Black American woman. Both America and Britain seem to have a lot of work and healing to do around their white supremacist attitudes and notions. Racism is real, plain and simple! And I get so sick an tired of being gaslighted into thinking, "No, it's just you being sensitive", when in fact, it's not. And it was certainly not Meghan!

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  63. To Anonymous 23.50 Regarding Meghan not availing herself to the team of doctors that tend to the Royal Family: Meghan was pregnant and seeing doctors, who she chose, on a regular basis. Even an Ob/Gyn would be able to help her, or at the very least refer her to a medical practitioner who could help her. Both Charles and Harry have spoken about receiving therapy for mental health issues...it is not taboo according to the "institution." So for Meghan to say that there was nobody to help her was NOT true. My heart goes out to anyone who is in distress and I fully understand that Meghan felt desperate. To be suicidal is alarming and sad. However, there was most certainly assistance available.

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    1. So you know this for a fact? How do you know what’s taboo or not within this institution? If it’s not taboo, why did HR said it couldn’t help her? Or when she asked the senior staff and the person told her no, it would make the institution looked bad.

      I think one very important thing you are missing is how would Meghan check herself in on her own in a psychiatric clinic without the tabloids getting a hold of this? They would have a field day. They already were the cause of her mental health problem. When it came to Meghan, the palace policy is to ditch the no comment rule and tell the tabloids the juicy headliners.

      From the sound of things, appointments are vetted and made by palace advisors. Was she supposed to disguise herself, ditch her security, do a quick escape out of the palace to a waiting uber to take her incognito for a psych evaluation? Can Meghan just leave without anyone knowing and leaking what she did to the tabloids? Who can she trust? And how do you find a psychiatrist you can trust. This isn’t her country. She doesn’t have an established network of people to fall back on.

      The reason why she was even thinking about suicide meant she was already in a bad place. She got to that mental state because she couldn’t trust the people there. They didn’t protect her. Or support her. As she said- they wouldn’t tell the truth to counter the lies.

      I think what you are missing here is Meghan felt she had no one to turn to. Except for Harry.

      It takes a lot guts to first admit you are suicidal and has a plan (that’s one of the things healthcare people assess to see how imminent is the danger) and secondly to ask for help is mentally draining because you are battling yourself. She discussed this.

      I think a little understanding goes a long way here. Not just for Meghan, but for anyone else who might reach that desperate place.




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    2. Emily - the only thing I would say is that everybody’s mental health struggles are different and despite huge strides towards public education on mental health, there is still huge stigma and lack of understanding. When you’re depressed to the point of having suicidal thoughts and in an environment where publicly, you are required to be a shiny, happy person and feeling vulnerable and discriminated against, it may well have been the case that Meghan didn’t feel there was anyone to help or felt unable to easily reach out and ask for that help.

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    3. Wow you don’t get to definitively assert what is true or not true. Yes other family members have mentioned therapy and mental health. None have mentioned a suicidal crisis that I’m aware of. So it’s quite possible when she was asking to literally be checked in somewhere for immediate inpatient help they were told it couldn’t be done or would be difficult to be done. Look at the press circus whenever any one of them is in the hospital! Kate for morning sickness or Philip for increasing complications related to his age. I think it’s very possible they told staff how serious it was and asked what could be done and were told there was no way to square the press coverage so deal with it silently and secretly. That’s MILES different than asserting that other family members have received therapy so obv this story doesn’t check out. And in fact I’m becoming increasingly bothered by this dismissal and second guessing of someone describing their own mental health crisis. Of all the things in the interview that I knew would be controversial and second guessed this feels like the sacred one to leave alone. She was in a crisis and they do not feel they received adequate help. End of story.

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    4. Emily, I guess Meghan was just lying? She did say she wanted to go somewhere, no just receive therapy. But I guess you know better her situation.

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    5. Emily I didn’t know you worked for the palace?
      How can you dismiss Meghan account of what happened to her which was backed up by Harry the born royal. I think it’s ridiculous for you, I or anyone to act as if we know more about their situation then they do. You wouldn’t like it if some stranger tries dismiss your trauma because it didn’t fit their narrative of your life would you?

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    6. Accusing her of lying about what help she was allowed and not allowed have access to during a mental health crisis is really low. She did not say there wasn't help available, she said she was not allowed to access that help. If she fit the description of someone who Harry was expected to marry (ie. an English Rose) she would have not only been permitted to access the help she needed, she probably wouldn't have needed it in the first place.

      Alicia

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  64. Anon 4.53. Your story is one that no woman should have to go through and I am so sorry that was your experience. I don't doubt what you have to say but that is not typical of all hospitals and all cries for help. I am a mental health clinician and the facility where I work has people on call 24/7. At any given time three people are available overnight. Nobody in a desperate situation is put on hold for two weeks and then told there are no appointments. I am not sure that the hospital that you say is one of the best in the country, is truly one of the best, or why would they operate this way? I can only speak from my own knowledge and I share Elizabeth's opinion that help was available for Meghan. It is most concerning that she was not able to access it. I wish both you and Meghan peace going forward.

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  65. Thabkyou for your coverage of the interview. I found it sad and although it was not as bad as I thought it was going to be, I think it was actually worse. Unfortunately the tabloid press will never leave them alone now. The daily mail has over 20 stories on it alone. I feel that it was a bad idea, as we will never know the full picture as the family won't bring out a tell-all to say "their truth". There may be more to some aspects than we know of, such as Charles not answering the phone to Harry- there are many plausible reasons. But I doubt that Charles will change the rules about Archie's HRH, he is a loving grandfather as we have seen with the pictures of George, Charlotte and Louis. I hope now they've said their side of the story they will feel happier, but I still hope that they can reconcile with the other royals. At least for Archie and the new baby's sake.
    On a happier note, she looked beautiful and I'm so pleased they'll be another little girl, someone for Charlotte to relate to being the granddaughter of a future king.

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    1. Damned if they do, damned if they don't. The tabloid press will never leave them alone even if there was no interview done. I'm sure they're aware that the tabloids will remain nasty and that there is huge public interest in them. As for the Firms "truth", that has been expressed via leaks by palace insiders for the last four years. I can see why they wanted to set things straight. If they reconcile with Harry's family members great, if that is not possible that's ok too. It doesn't affect any of us and I'm sure their kids will be just fine.

      Amanda

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  66. Personally I do not like the whole idea of this interview, because I do not understand its purpose. Wouldn't they prefer to enjoy their privacy now that they moved far away, rather than having the whole world discussing what they went trough? Is it to give a message to the Royal Family? If so, why not do it privately? Surely the interview will take them even further apart from the family, and it is a shame, because it will always be Harry's family, after all.

    They are a nice couple and they had a really good potential to do good things for the monarchy, it's too bad that didn't happen. But now it feels like they want some revenge, while I think they should just let go and live their life.

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  67. from the National Post, a Canadian newspaper:

    As potential heirs to the throne of the United Kingdom, the Queen’s immediate family are what’s known as Internationally Protected Persons (IPP) – a very rare classification usually only extended to heads of state and senior

    The moment Prince Harry and Meghan Markle arrived on Vancouver Island in December, 2019, their status as royals meant they were furnished a taxpayer-funded RCMP detail without even needing to ask. “As the Duke and Duchess are currently recognized as Internationally Protected Persons, Canada has an obligation to provide security assistance on an as needed basis,” Public Safety Minister Bill Blair said at the time.

    Over a two-month period from November, 2019 to January, 2020, Canadians paid $56,384 on RCMP protection for Harry and Meghan, according to documents obtained by the Canadian Taxpayers Federation. An Angus Reid Institute poll from January, 2020 found that 73 per cent of Canadians objected to paying Harry and Meghan’s security tab. When the couple moved to the United States it prompted a tweet from then-U.S. president Donald Trump that the U.S. “would not pay for their security protection.”

    Prince Harry cited the withdrawal of security in their decision to leave Canada for the Los Angeles home of actor and producer Tyler Perry. “While we were in Canada at someone else’s house I then got told on short notice that security was going to be removed,” he said.

    “Suddenly it dawned on me ‘hang on a second, the borders could be closed, we’re going to have our security removed and who knows how long lockdown is going to be? The world knows where we are, it’s not safe, it’s not secure.”

    The “someone else’s house” he cited was the $14 million Vancouver Island home of music producer David Foster, a Victoria native. Foster’s wife, Katharine McPhee, studied musical theatre with Markle when they were both teenagers in Los Angeles. The home was described by at least one publication as a “Canadian fortress.”

    The couple’s brief stay on the Island was notable for a lack of any security incidents, and even saw local businesses banning paparazzi from their premises in order to welcome the couple. The B.C. capital and its surroundings are notable as a clandestine hideaway for any number of the world’s rich and powerful, including Foster, Canada’s richest woman Sherry Brydson, and Shopify co-founder Scott Lake.

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  68. Through her life, Meghan has proven herself a resourceful and independent woman. Who knows what effect bullying has on a person's mental health and how it affects these two qualities. When Meghan says she could not access the help she needed, I believe her. For those who state that there "certainly" was assistance available, perhaps there was, but the point is, but not to her. I understand that people are questioning that a senior member of the royal family is not able to access medical help, but we are speaking about mental health, a whole issue in itself. I don't know how William and Kate will be able to continue to try to work on mental health as one of their issues with much credibility.

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  69. What a snake!!! Poor Harry...

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  70. I have reviewed the interview in my mind and have read so many comments and opinions. There is no doubt that there has been unfair & unjust treatment of Harry & Meghan, but I still have questions.

    Meghan is an extremely smart & intuitive woman, who, as an actor, would have experience in researching for roles. I find it hard to understand how she entered the family so naive without any understanding of how the royal family worked. It's true that there are thing one cannot fully know until you're in the place, but just the experience of Diana should have given pause to looking into things, asking more questions, or what about just being excited to understand what life as a royal would mean. This is certainly a shortfall on Harry's part as well.

    As much as many people have tried to explain the difference between "the family" and "the firm", it's not clear at all to me. Harry & Meghan were & are very supportive of the queen, but it leads me to wonder if even the queen is in "control"...or is she at the mercy of her advisors, courtiers etc? If the queen invited Harry & Meghan to her place when they returned from Canada, why did she back out? Who is really the head and in control of the royal family? Is it becoming apparent that the faces of the family are only that?

    I understand Meghan's concern about Archie's security. As a mother, your child's safety is your utmost concern. But I'm also thinking....you wanted to step back and step away from the institution yet are now wanting the perks that come with it. You're "turning your backs" in a sense and then expecting them to step forward with what you want & need. It somehow doesn't quite compute.

    Meghan unable to access help when she reached such a low point is very troubling. It's very hard when you are in that state to think clearly or even think about how to access options, but I do find it hard to believe that nothing could be done. Harry must have contacts, other avenues to go when the "suits" don't give him the answers he wants. If that is not true, it leaves me thinking the royal family members are all "puppets" and don't have any "voice" and I find that very hard to believe or reconcile.

    There's no doubt the issue of racism has to be addressed. It's good that it was made clear in other clips that it was NOT the Queen or Prince Philip who commented about the color of their baby's skin, but I almost think it would have been better if Harry DID reveal who it was. The doubt & suspicious it's now casting on all the other family members is very sad.

    We will never know what goes on behind closed doors, and we all wish for reconciliation in some of the relationships, but unfortunately, this interview probably did more harm than good between family members. I'm glad Harry & Meghan are on a course that seems best for them and are truly happy again. That & a baby girl is the good news. Let's only hope that the sad news that relationships may be even more strained and the whole institution of the royal family is being questioned will result in change, repentance, good upheaval and a renewing of what's right & good!

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  71. To be acutely suicidal and want to be checked into the hospital is different than getting help through a doctor ie meds and therapy. She said she couldnt be alone as her thoughts were so severe.

    She was not permitted/supported to get the help she needed - not that she had access to zero help at all.

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  72. I have been a long time follower of The Duchess of Cambridge blog and Mad About Meghan but have never commented before. I found the interview with Oprah to generate a lot more questions to me than answer any. It also seems to be very one sided. I 100% believe that she was going through a serious mental health crisis. What doesn't make sense (as it wasn't elaborated) was that she had no help in any type of capacity. For years there has been a large focus on mental health started by William, Kate, and Harry which then Meghan joined. Was that focus not at all sincere for any of them? This really directly contradicts the focus of all four of them. If Harry was always so close to his family why did he feel embarrassed to talk to any of his family members about such a serious thing going on with his wife and in his life? I find it strange that they talked about how the firm and the family are their own entities. Wouldn't you go to your family if the firm was blocking you and ask for their personal support at the very least? It does seem as though the royal family would then be blind sided by such serious information and if this is the first to hear of it they must have really not understood the severity of the situation when the couple decided to step back. I also found the story about "setting the record straight" about the Kate issue a little bit of a low blow. Family issues happen, not everyone apologizes, and members often talk while changing facts. Both women were under a huge amount of stress at the time. Personally I cannot see why that particular issue was so important to Meghan for setting the record straight. Especially after just finishing telling Oprah that family members in the royal family are silenced. In trying to set the record straight she now puts Kate in a horrible position with no ability to defend herself and giving zero details about how big or small the misunderstanding was when she knows herself first hand how that would feel. I feel that was so wrong on so many levels just because her feelings were hurt regardless of her finishing it up by saying Kate is a good person. It seems there is just more than meets the eye here and nobody will every know both sides I'm sure. It does seem as though there has been a lot of miscommunication and understanding from both sides about how things are, should be, and what is wanted. I can understand her being very upset about the media attacks and there is no excuse for it but it's too bad she took it so personally and allowed it to affect her in this way. I really do have sympathy though for both of them trying to move away and end the insanity. People will always talk though no matter when they go in the world and you simply just cannot control what the media will say even if you spend all your time trying set the record straight. It is sad that they felt no other choice!

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    1. Having suicidal ideation is NOT EVEN COMPARABLE to "taking it personally".

      Alicia

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  73. This is very gossipy so I apologize, but Harry implied that there was an issue in how popular Meghan was on the Australia tour. I remember that right before the Australia tour ended, the two families were split at home from their foundation. It was extremely odd and definitely took focus off the tour. I am finding that I believe more is done by the "men behind the curtains" than by the royal themselves. I think setting the record straight regarding Kate is not a reflection on Kate but rather on what the institution was doing to Meghan. As much as I am a 100%-you-can-do-no-wrong supporter of Meghan, in fairness, it does not seem like Kate has any input into what is denied or ignored. The idea that her botox rumor had to be denied blows me away, because botox is not a crime or embarrassment, but I guess some people thought it was. Thus, to allow the rumors that Meghan made Kate cry, that Meghan's avocados (only hers) would destroy the world, that her baby bump was never to be touched, that she could not hold Archie the right way tell me that some people wanted her light to be greatly diminished. I think they hoped she would leave. What is a shame is that her popularity did not take away from Kate's -- it added to it in my view, especially if they could have been seen together more often. Even when they were together, they were apart. Second guessing, Kate probably told Meghan that all royal bridesmaids wear tights, Meghan preferred them without, and Kate, a few weeks after giving birth to a third child and having to appear perfect at the upcoming wedding, may have told Meghan that she needed to do it anyway. When Kate realized how she hurt Meghan, she apologized and sent flowers. End of story. If the reverse occurred, I would be satisfied. A stressful time! Maybe Meghan was too stressed out and overreacted. I don't think the event is an issue -- the allowance of the long-held rumor that Meghan did it to Kate, without apologizing, is the issue. The palace could have just said that it did not occur. I am doubting how good communication can help if the aides continue to rule the RF.

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  74. It seems the only words the RF and press knows are "saddened," "despair," and "devastated."

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