In a moving and poignant tribute, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex marked Remembrance Sunday by privately visiting Los Angeles National Cemetery earlier today.
Remembrance Sunday holds a deeply special place in all our hearts in the UK, and for none more so than those who have courageously served their country. Prince Harry is a shining example of a man who served Queen and country. A man who was determined to receive no special treatment or favour because of his position. Captain Wales served for a decade - undertaking two tours to Afghanistan - the first member of the Royal family in twenty-five years to serve in a war zone. Upon leaving the army to focus on his duties, he vowed his time in the army would "stay with him for the rest of his life". A promise he has kept in the years since with supporting veterans, military charities and his inspiring brainchild Invictus at the very heart of his work.
All of the above serves to explain the enormous disappointment I felt this morning as I scrolled through the Sunday papers. On a day for reflection, it was quite shocking to see royal aides using today of all days to inform several newspapers -- including The Sunday Times and the Telegraph -- Harry "had hoped to return to the UK for the event". He was told he would have "no official role" and "was not invited". Determined to honour those who made the ultimate sacrifice, Harry made a personal request to Buckingham Palace for a wreath to be laid on his behalf. Not only was this "refused", quite clearly it was decided the next course of action was to inform the press. Harry is said to have been "deeply saddened" by this. It's an appalling situation and quite clear those who were actively against the couple during their time in the UK continue to behave with an astonishing degree of pettiness considering the significance of the day. The fact the Queen's grandson who commendably served in the armed forces was unwelcome at Whitehall alongside his family -- and the continued attempts to discredit him by attacking his commitment to the military -- is frankly rather disturbing at this stage, and perhaps a window on the internal situation which became intolerable for the couple.
Harry's friend and special forces soldier Dean Stott shared the following tweet - a sentiment echoed by many in the military community.
'War hero Prince Harry asked to have a wreath of poppies laid at the national memorial to those servicemen and women who have fallen, but it was turned down.
Harry, who served in the British army for ten years and went on two tours of Afghanistan in that time, would have been in the U.K. in this period of remembrance if the coronavirus pandemic hadn’t hit all travel plans. And he would have made a tribute of his own alongside some of his military comrades, sources have told PEOPLE.'
Veteran BBC royal correspondent Peter Hunt had this to say.
Nonetheless, Harry was determined to share his support in any way he could. Speaking alongside several veterans on the Declassified podcast, Harry spoke of how much Remembrance Sunday means to him, describing it as "a moment for respect and for hope", adding remembrance is "a profound act of honour". The Prince continued, "It's how we preserve the legacies of entire generations and show our gratitude for the sacrifices they made in order for us to be able to live the lives we live today. Being able to wear my uniform, being able to stand up in service of one's country, these are amongst the greatest honours there are in life. To me, the uniform is a symbol of something much bigger, it's symbolic of our commitment to protecting our country, as well as protecting our values."
Harry added, "These values are put in action through service, and service is what happens in the quiet and in the chaos. It's what happens in the darkness, it’s what happens when people aren't looking. It’s what happens on and off the battlefield. It's about carrying out our duty as soldiers. For me as a father, a husband and as a human being, it’s about how we uphold these values in every aspect of our lives." Adding he firmly believes "once served, always serving".
Harry and Meghan laid bouquets of flowers the Duchess picked from their garden at the graves of two Commonwealth soldiers -- one who had served in the Royal Canadian Artillery and another in the Royal Australian Air Force. Canada holds a special place in Harry and Meghan's hearts, as does Australia, their first Commonwealth tour as a married a couple and the location of the last Invictus games.
A message on their wreath read, "In Memory of the Men Who Offered Their Lives in Defense of Their Country. To all of those who have served, and are serving. Thank you."
More from Harper's Bazaar:
'The couple, who only took their masks off when they were alone, also carefully placed a wreath at an obelisk in the cemetery that features a plaque that’s inscribed, "In Memory of the Men Who Offered Their Lives in Defense of Their Country." Harry—who wore his 2002 Queen’s Golden Jubilee medal, 2008 Afghanistan Operational Service medal, and 2012 Queen’s Diamond Jubilee medal—wrote a message with the wreath that read, "To all of those who have served, and are serving. Thank you."
A source close to the Sussexes tells BAZAAR, "It was important to the duke and duchess to be able to personally recognise Remembrance in their own way, to pay tribute to those who have served and to those who gave their lives."
The choice of LA National Cemetery has a special meaning for Meghan; across the road is Veterans Affairs Greater Los Angeles Health Care System building, which was used by her grandfather Alvin Ragland after he served in the US Coast Guard.
In a 2015 piece for The Tig marking Martin Luther King Day 'Champions of Change', Meghan wrote about her grandfather:
"When my grandparents decided to move the family from Ohio to California, my mom was about seven years old. A family of five, they packed up the car and took a road trip to Los Angeles. My grandfather told me this story when I was eleven years old. To me road trips were - “are we there yet?”s, the license plate game, the drive thrus for filler food (where McDonalds is less of a treat and more of the norm), photo ops by signs welcoming you from one state to the next, and stops at local restaurants to stretch your legs. “Things were different then,” my grandfather said.
Meggie, on our road trip, when we went to Kentucky Fried Chicken, we had to go to the back for ‘coloreds.’ The kitchen staff handed me the chicken from the back door and we ate in the parking lot. That’s just what it was. That’s just what it was.
That story still haunts me. It reminds me of how young our country is. How far we’ve come and how far we still have to come. It makes me think of the countless black jokes people have shared in front of me, not realizing I am mixed. Unaware that I am the ethnically ambiguous fly on the wall. It makes me wonder what my parents experienced as a mixed race couple. It echoes the time my mom and I were leaving a concert at The Hollywood Bowl, and a woman called her the “N” word because she was taking too long to pull out of the parking spot. I remember how hot my skin felt. How it scorched the air around me.
To Martin Luther King Jr., to Harvey Milk, to Gloria Steinem and Cesar Chavez, to my mom and dad for choosing each other not for the “color of their skin but the content of their character“…to all of you champions of change: Thank you."
The images were taken by Lee Morgan, an "Afro-American/Brazilian photographer, raised in New York and currently residing in Los Angeles, California". The talented photographer has worked with Vogue and Neiman Marcus.
Lest we forget. Below, a reading by Harry in 2016 of 'The Soldier' by First World War poet Rupert Brooke.
The Duchess was elegant in a black belted wool satin faille jacket dress by Brandon Maxwell (a great spot by UFO No More). Meghan carried a matching clutch and fittingly accessorised with a poppy on her lapel.
Meghan's shoes are the Lorenzo pumps in black suede by British brand Jennifer Chamandi (with many thanks to UFO No More). "Flawless black suede is handcrafted by Italian artisans into a comfortable and supremely balanced pump."
Meghan wore the stylish shoes in two-tone for a visit to Dagenham in March.
In other news, the official website for Archewell is live and you can sign up for updates. It would appear the proper launch and announcement of plans for the non-profit is very much in the final stages of preparation.
It was touching to see Harry marking Remembrance Day in his own way, with his wife by his side.
UPDATE: I just wanted to respond to a couple of points raised. With thanks to those who have commented respectfully, I appreciate it. On Remembrance Sunday, wreaths are laid by members of the Royal family, politicians, VIPs, forces and representatives. They are also laid by youth organisations, charities and members of the public. For example, royal photographer Athur Edwards was permitted to lay a wreath on behalf of readers of The Sun newspaper.
A wreath could have been left after the ceremony. I do think Harry's name could have been added to one given the work he's done with Invictus, Walking with the Wounded, the Endeavour Fund, Team Rubicon UK and many other military charities. Harry still means a great deal to the military community. Even if one feels he shouldn't be included, the only purpose leaking it to The Sunday Times serves is to humiliate him. Several other outlets followed up this story and confirmed it is true. By their own admission, Harry is still part of the family, so this ongoing leaking campaign from senior royal aides serves to only further widen the divide.
Consider Princess Madeleine of Sweden, who lives in the US with her family and opted to forfeit titles for her children. Madeleine has been able to return as she wishes, participate in family occasions and continue to work on the causes closest to her heart. If we look to 2019 (pre-Covid) we saw Madeleine at the Nobel Prize banquet, supporting a book fair in Sweden, attending her sister Victoria's birthday celebrations and official events associated with the day. She also attended a major charity dinner with her family and attended a series of meetings, etc.
Most crucially, her mother's Childhood Foundation is the area she has worked in particularly (similar to Harry with the military), so she has conitnued this work both in the US and Sweden. There was never a question of her not doing so given her prior commitment.
Imagine if every communication between Madeleine and the Swedish royal court was leaked and sensationalised. What purpose would it serve? I'm sure there were issues to iron out - the Swedes did it discreetly. The Swedish royal family were presented with a new set of cirucmstances and adapted and modernised recognising Madeleine is the daughter of a king and the sister of a future queen. They also recognise the benefit she brings to the Childhood Foundation with an appreciation for her wish to live her life in the US.
Additional reporting from People:
'In fact, there was a wreath ready and waiting for him — the official organizers of the event, which honors those who have been killed and wounded in war, had created a display and set it aside for Harry.
But courtiers and palace officials decided that he couldn’t have his wreath added to those from other members of the royal family because he and Meghan Markle are no longer working members of the institution.
Harry “understands that he doesn’t have the same formal role in the family as he used to,” a source close to him tells PEOPLE. “But he was saddened and disappointed by the decision.”
Robert Lacey recently penned a book on the situation. A respected royal writer, it was expected his book would be the antithesis of Finding Freedom. Instead, his view on the situation was enlightening -- to say the least. He has sources going back decades in the Palace. He had this to say on the wreath laying: "I think this is an indication that things are worse than we thought. If everything was hunkydorey there seems no reason why a wreath should not have been laid in Harry's name. If the Royal family or the palace wanted to co-operate then it would seem to be a perfectly reasonable request to make that could have been fulfilled. I don't think it augurs well for the prospects of a reconciliation. On the face of this, it would seem that Harry is keener on reconciliation or maintaining some sort of link than the palace is to granting one."
I find the pettiness with which Harry and Meghan are being treated by the other royals and the gray suits appalling.
ReplyDeleteThat he was stripped of his right to wear the uniform after serving in the field when other royals who did not are free to "play dress up" in theirs on this date is more irksome than no longer being addressed as HRH and other privileges lost.
Kudos to them for marking the day in their own meaningful way. My respect for them grows daily.
I could not agree with you more, Philly. It is petty, mean. And the queen should stop this. If anyone should commemorate war dead out of all if them. Its Harry. Im really angry.
DeleteI agree Philly. Much respect to them for marking this day in their own meaningful way. On a fashion note, I love both outfits (especially Meghan’s shoes.)
DeleteI suspect that the effort here from 'the palace' is to basically turn Harry and Meghan into the Duke and Dutchess of Windsor - isolated, sad, despised. The message is - 'it's our way or the highway - we have no interest in cooperating with someone who decided he no longer wanted to play our game/our way." I think we can anticipate this sort of behavior every single time.
DeleteSadly,I am afraid you have the right if it,Helene
Delete@Helene,
DeleteI agree a 100%. I don't think the UK royal family realizes how antiquated and ridiculous they look to the world lately. Charlotte has given in her report a great example on how other royal families in Europe have modernized and adapted. Look with how much respect Madeleine of Sweaden is treated by her family!!!
B&B
I’m so stunned and saddened by the circumstances surrounding this moment. I read the post on HRH Duchess Kate and thought, as I have on so many other occasions, how I wished the Sussexes could be involved. Knowing that they found their own way to honor those who served is somehow equally heartbreaking and hopeful. This is what Remembrance Day tradition should look like-a collective expression to honor those who sacrificially gave. Formality loses its meaning when it forget this purpose.
ReplyDelete"This is what Remembrance Day tradition should look like-a collective expression to honor those who sacrificially gave. Formality loses its meaning when it forget this purpose".
DeleteThese are beautiful words Lacy, thank you so much for sharing them with us!!
Formality is nothing without purpose, and I think someone showed what purpose looked like yesteray.
DeleteThis is the first time I have felt sad on harrys behalf since they left. Such a petty and mean thing to not place a wreath on his behalf. Im glad he honored war dead in his own way today.
ReplyDeleteWell said, bluhare. And as you said above, the Queen should put a stop to this. But, if we know anything about the Queen, it's rarely her choice to do so. It seems she prefers to see things play out "without interfering" when it comes certain family issues. And why so much control is given to the gray suits is beyond my understanding. Sometimes it seems that the royals are their puppets in situations where the Queen could put her magisterial foot down.
DeleteTHIS! I agree with you both. The royals/grey suits are prolonging the awkwardness, pettiness, and opportunities for tabloid gossip. If the Queen wanted everything to blow over, then she should put a stop to this. It does seem like the courtiers hold much more power than she does...perhaps she really is too old, now, for the role?
DeleteI’m not sure anyone could convince me, at this point, that several of the family members are behind the Sussex slandering. I feel really badly for Harry. It seems the palace is going to try their damndest to keep a cloud hanging over the Sussexes’ lives for as long as they can.
Thank you, Philly. I have such a hard time believing they are held hostage by their staff, though. Don't you when you think about jt? Its so much nicer to think that HM and Charles are somehow kept in the dark about all these machinations going on. I just don't believe it. They have to know. And if they didn't know yesterday they sure as hell know today. I have come to the conclusion that they really dont give a damn. Because if they did, they'd have done something.
DeleteBluhare and Philly so well said and I agree with you both.
Deletewell done H & M for observing Remembrance Day in LA. Nice to have laid flowers from their own garden too. Charlotte the significance of this and all you have explained about the no wreath in London it seems to frivolous to talk about clothes but.... I love the shoes ; )
DeleteSue in Oz
This was a working royal ceremony and Harry is no longer a working royal. He is in exile in the US so it is no surprise that he was not permitted to participate and an official working event.
DeleteI find this so incredibly sad, that Harry would be treated with such disrespect after his years of service and continued dedication to members of the military. That he is being treated this way by his OWN family is incomprehensible. I'm so glad that he has Meghan and Archie, and I respect their continued efforts to do what is right for their little family. I've felt all along that stepping down was a brave and necessary choice, never more so than now. I hope they know how many people admire and respect them. I hope they know how many people around the world are wishing them well. Most of all, I hope they continue to be happy and healthy, and find joy in their family and fulfillment in their work. We're all rooting for you!
DeleteFeeling sorry for Harry and Meghan is missing the point. The fact that they did commemorate in their own way speaks volumes for the point of it all, honoring the military veterans. They did a lovely job with their own personal touches. Who would have laid a wreath on Harry's behalf in London? How would it have been done without it being about the Sussexes, when for this event it is not about them. Let them show their own strength in all this and stop with the pity party. The pettiness of picking apart everything is just too much anymore, let's move on, it seems the Sussexes have.
DeleteSadness is what I felt too, the pictures of Harry in a suit and all his medals in a sunny cemetery miles away from home felt so pathetic.
DeleteBut I attribute it to the virus, I am sure he would have flown to the UK much sooner, for trooping, and would also have been there to honor the fallen. The timing of the pandemic has been very bad for them, as it has been for most people...
@Philly, yes if the courtiers are indeed the ones making these important decisions, without the Queen's thoughts, then 1) why are the British taxpayers paying anything towards the monarchy; 2) if the Queen is unable or unwilling to make these decisions then it's time for her to step down and let Charles take over.
DeleteI regard this as a missed opportunity from the royals, if everything returns to normal and Charles becomes King, a helping hand could be useful. They basically turned that down. In the entire family it is only Harry who did a huge amount for veterans and no one can take that away from him. Short sighted it was!
DeleteI'm not feeling sorry for them, as much as I am sad at the disrespect shown. Who would have placed a wreath? His brother? His father? Boris Johnson? A friend of Harry's? One was placed for Philip by Charles. He also placed one for his mother and himself. One more wouldn't have hurt.
DeleteOf all of them -- including Wessex all duded up in a uniform for a branch of the military in which he never served -- had the opportunity to do this for Harry who, at least in the PR statements, is still a part of the family.
I'm disgusted with them all.
Anett, I agree. A totally missed opportunity
DeleteAbsolutely. Disgraceful behavior by BRF.
DeleteOk, we all feel sorry for Harry, but why bring along a photographer if they didn't do it for the publicity? It just gives people an open door to criticize this couple. It is sad for all involved. Ann B
ReplyDeleteThe photographer was needed to provide pictures to the military and veterans community to show Harry still supports, respect, and honor them. They have been attacking him for months saying he has abandoned the military and his charities. A picture is worth a thousand words.
DeleteIt's not just publicity. I'm sure Harry wants to make it clear to his Invictus people, and more, that he has not given up on his support for UK troops, current and former. That might have been the "take" if they had not bad these photos.
DeleteTotally agree
DeleteIf you have an issue with that, then you must have an issue with all royal PR visits where they take photographers with them.
DeleteHe can show he paid his respects as well. There are no ceremonies in the US like Britain; the last wars were not as close to the US as they were to Britain. If the two dead soldiers they saw still have family alive, I bet they were incredibly touched Harry laid flowers at their graves.
He's showing public support. Putting the effort into this is more than just a quick note.
DeleteThis was a public display to show his support. This was much more than a quick note. The military means more than that.
Delete@Anonymous 0050,
DeleteThe tabloids want everyone to think it was for publicity. At least the Military community has Harry's back. They cannot be fooled by the media like other people. Did you read Charlotte's entire report? The Military has always had a special part in their hearts for Harry.
B&B
I'm appalled by the behavior of those making these cruel and petty decisions at Buckingham Palace. I suspect, however, that it is only a continuation of the treatment that caused them to leave. I believe their combined charisma and popularity was a threat to those in line, and it could not be tolerated. It's sad that the Queen doesn't seem to recognize that this is not a good look for her or those in that precious line.
ReplyDeleteRespect to Harry and Meghan for honoring veterans and the war dead in their own, lonely way. I think the loneliness of the photos is an appropriate condemnation of Buckingham Palace.
I'm so pleased to see Harry and Meghan moving forward with Archwell, and to see Meghan's support for Social Media Kindness Day. She, of all people, knows how cruel Social Media can be.
Thank you, Charlotte, for always telling the truth about Harry and Meghan, and what they endure from the Royal Family and the grey suits.
R
I like the way you think, R.
DeleteThis is shocking. My heart breaks for Harry. I have been shouted down repeatedly on various social media sites for “siding” with Harry and Meghan and not understanding that he supposedly abandoned his duty in a fit of love struck impulsiveness. I have never once believed this narrative.
ReplyDeleteI think what is probably far more accurate is that the situation within the family to a certain degree, but definitely within the larger Royal Family apparatus including these ridiculous courtiers and aides and “sources” had become completely untenable to the point of abusive. This sad episode only confirms my suspicions. Harry is a decorated combat veteran. Out of EVERYONE in the BRF with the exception of HM, he deserved to be there the most. From the outset he and Meghan indicated that would be happy to still support royal family functions. This would have been a perfect opportunity. And for those so fond to discuss “optics” the optics of welcoming him to this event would have garnered incalculable goodwill. Honestly his family owed him that. They have used him when convenient for their image, such as forcing a 12 year old boy to walk behind mother’s coffin in view of a global audience, but refuse to be supportive of his different path.
I have long felt Harry’s decision to leave was not made lightly, or a superficial interest in making a ton of money in America. And I will always maintain he was the primary decision maker for his family on this matter, not Meghan brashly leading him astray as so many tabloid narratives are fond of spouting. He is a man who in many ways has weathered so many tragedies under circumstances none of us could even imagine. And he has had the great good fortune to find a partner who is so unconditionally loving and supportive. I will forever be thrilled for him and the direction his life has taken.
I’m sorry Charlotte, I adore you and this blog, and the Duchess Kate blog, and I hate to leave such an emotion filled comment, but I’m just so disappointed. I fear this may have been it for my following of the BRF. I have been immensely bothered by the handling of the Prince Andrew situation and now this. I just don’t see how I can find myself interested anymore.
I could not agree more. I have my suspicions on who may be leading the charge as well, and it isn't the queen.
DeleteI also find it hard to believe that if Charles or William really wanted to, they wouldn't have had enough power to override whatever objections might have been raised. Just this once at least
DeleteI think they’re doing admirably well all things considered.
ReplyDeleteJust a thought, might Meghan be pregnant??? ain some of the photos it looks like she might be - which would be wonderful!
is any of this actually true or does someone in the press just making it up.
ReplyDeleteI'm angry, too. I guess the emphasis on kindness and mental health does not extend to one's own family. Why do courtiers have more power than the Queen and Charles? Well, I could write more but won't.
ReplyDeleteMy heart actually breaks that Prince Harry’s intention to honour Remembrance Day was denied . I’m truly shocked that his grandmother, father & brother don’t have the ability or courage to intervene .
ReplyDeleteI often wonder if the treatment that Harry & Meghan receive will result in the downfall of the monarchy once Prince Charles becomes king .
My heartfelt thoughts are with Harry, those he served with & all that paid the ultimate sacrifice so that I may be free !! “We Remember”
I don't see it. Only the citizens of the UK can get rid of the monarchy. Harry and Meghan are not as well liked in the UK as many might think. It would say it is a 50/50 situation with more and more people getting annoyed and just don't want to hear anymore drama anymore. It has gotten completely out of hand and rather embarassing for everyone involved (even though more so for the BRF in this particular instant).
DeleteC.
Why aren't Harry and meghan well liked? I know they arent, especially meghan, but Harry was always at the top of popularity lists. And what have they done to inspire the dislike? If you look at it only on their public work, which is how I judge them all, what have they done that was so awful? I can't think of a thing. But they have received negative press reminiscent of the good old days with Charles and camilla, who were also judged based on private issues. In that case, Diana leaked it and some of it may be exaggerated. The same has happened here I thi k, only in this case, jts actually staff who have been leaking, apparently with the tacit ok of their bosses as I haven't heard of anyone getting sacked.
DeleteIt is not a good look, and it does not make the royal family look like wise leaders at all, just the reverse.
Awesome well written article. I am convinced the Queen doesn't run the Monarchy. God bless Prince Harry for not being afraid to walk in his own path. He bought attention to the fallen soldiers of the Commonwealth that are buried at the National Cementary in Los Angeles that many of us Americans were not aware of. Thank you Prince Harry
ReplyDeleteIt makes perfect sense to me. If you aren't there, if you chose to leave your royal duties, why would someone lay a wreath on your behalf? Did he want his father to lay one for the Queen, one for himself, one for Harry? Did he want his brother William to do it? There are millions of servicemen who didn't get to lay a wreath who are deserving and are in the country. The presentation of information here says "Harry wanted no special treatment" while in the service, but apparently he wants special treatment and a wreath laid for him? It's contradictory.
ReplyDeleteHe decided to move to CA with his wife and child, remove himself from Royal duties, and took 100 million dollars from a media company that profits off his Grandmother's and his parent's lives - Netflix's The Crown. He and Meghan hired a photographer and went to a cemetery in the US to be seen making a fuss on a day when the Royal family was leading the Nation they represent in honoring the service men and women. This narrative that the Sussexes are being treated badly is somewhat disingenuous. And Harry wanting press for laying a wreath is somewhat concerning.
I fully agree with your comment Florida Moxie. I am a big supporter of Harry and Meghan but the ceremony in London at the Cenotaph is a long standing tradition with rhyme and reason as to who is there, what they represent and why they are laying wreaths. Meghan and Harry’s role in the royal family is now equivalent to Bea, Eugenie, Zara and the other cousins. And they do not have wreaths laid on their behalf. I think Meghan and Harry are doing amazing work but you can’t have it both ways.
DeleteI agree with most of what you've said here, Florida Moxie. I don't deny that there may have been some poor treatment of Harry by The Firm. But, does he want to be royal, with all the rights and responsibilities, or doesn't he? I am sure his intent to honor the fallen is sincere, but why do it in such an attention grabbing way? Having a photographer present only brings attention to Meghan and him, not the sacrifices of the fallen.
DeleteTo me, though I know many will disagree, this looked like a sad attempt by the couple to recreate the annual scene in London, even if that may not have been their intention.
they always wanted to work for the royal family, even now. And Harry would have wanted to be at the Cenotaph if he could. He said as much. The military is his calling, he's always said it. To not allow him to participate while Michael, who also is non working and his wife cashes in as much as she can, gets to parade up and down in a uniform he didn't earn.
DeleteNo, this isn't harry looking for publicity. It's harry wanting to honor war dead in his own country. I'm surprised you aren't understanding of that.
He served for 10 years; an extra wreath wouldn't have hurt anyone.
DeleteI'm glad M&H did this. Harry once referred to his time in the military as the one place he felt normal, & his military outreach & charity work speaks to his dedication to serving those who served/serve. It's important to him - and for his family, tho I guess immediate family only this round - to honor that part of his life. -op
Oh come on. *insert eyeroll*
DeleteThey were bullied incessantly in the UK, including being basically screamed at to leave the UK and the royal purse. They did and became financially independent -- thus the deal with Netflix -- and now they're being disparaged for that. It was one wreath. ONE WREATH. For a man who has always been deeply committed to military causes, and his family couldn't even grant him that -- despite, might I add, their wish to move on. Well, denying a feasible, simple request and then leaking that refusal to the press is not moving on. Nor is it healthy. ESPECIALLY for a family that touts mental health as much as they do.
@Jean in Canada,
DeleteYou are right about "Bea, Eugenie, Zara and the other cousins" BUT... they did not serve in the military. It's not about "you can't have it both ways." It's about RESPECT.
As for me, I understand RESPECT coming from a military family. Of course a photographer was present to show the UK military that he will always support them even from afar. I applaud this respectful gesture from a VETERAN. God bless him and everyone who supports veterans around the world! Our families appreciate it.
Those laying wreaths at the Cenotaph are either representives of the monarchy or the government. At this point in time, Harry is neither. He is a private citizen, as was emphasized when he stood by Meghan's side encouraging voting in a country other than his own. The comment from BP at that time was that he was a private citizen and did not represent the Queen and thus was free to do so.
ReplyDeleteI know this is a difficult time for Harry, but many,many have served more years
than Harry. If he was allowed a wreath on that basis, why not others? Why not that marvelous Captain who raised so much money for the NHS?
Further, this was a significant decision; one which would not have even been made without the Queen's or Charles's input. HM means what she says and says what she means.
I am not sure if "Courtiers" are the "gray suits" of Diana fame. In any event, the actual source and origin of this story remains a mystery,as no format is referencing BP or the Queen as a direct source.
I believe Harry was sincere in wanting to honor the fallen. The visit to this site was entirely appropriate. It was the timing that may have been off, coinciding with the Centotaph ceremony. It is just unfortunate that the story circulated of his being disappointed about not having a part in the Centotaph ceremony.
I look forward to seeing what their plans for the American Veteran's Day are. This may have been a more diplomatic occasion for Harry to express his honor for the lost, as he and his wife have chosen to make their home in America.
Anon 3:54
DeleteIt was not for Government and monarch only because the photographer for the sun laid one and someone also laid for andrew so that is not accurate
Harry is still a member of the family, by the family's admission. The fact that apparently that was just for show and PR is a very sad thing. IMO, of course.
DeleteIt seems like not everyone has read Charlotte's ENTIRE article before commenting?
DeleteLaying wreaths on Remembrance Sunday is not only for representatives of the monarchy and the government. Charlotte states they are also laid by "youth organisations and members of the public." Even a photographer from the Sun laid a wreath on BEHALF of the Sun readers. So... why couldn't a wreath be laid on BEHALF of Harry who is a veteran? SMH
Wreaths are laid by members of the royal family - a role that Harry & Megan have stepped down from. The only wreath that is laid on behalf of someone is the Queen who is present but has stepped back from the actual task due to her age. I don't see this as a slight or pettiness...it's not something that is done. If Harry was in England maybe they would have let him lay a wreath based on the division of the armed forces he served in but not as a representative of the royal family, that was clear that when they stepped down, they were giving that up. Making a show of something that is important to you and releasing photos screams that they are trying to grab attention and frankly take away from the services in London today. It was there choice to step down, there are consequences to choices.
ReplyDeleteParticipating in an important ceremony from afar is not necessarily "trying to grab attention" or "take away from services in London." Why can't it be perceived as a sincere and creative way to respectfully participate and complement those services from afar?
DeleteHonestly, you could make the same claim of a 12 year-old child walking behind his mother's coffin as "screaming" to grab attention. And maybe it was--using a child and his brother for pity and sympathy at a time when there was none for Charles. They could all have taken cars. But the royals are a show. They use fanfare, pomp and circumstance to their advantage all the time. It's the family culture to do so.
Harry (and anyone affiliated with him, most especially his wife and child) will always draw attention because of who his parents and grandmother are.
Totally agree with the comment
DeleteNope. One was laid on behalf of Philip. Charles laid it along for the one on behalf of his mother. Harry is also a member of the family. So is Prince Michael, who was there doing his best George V/Russian Tsar impression, and he isn't a working member either.
DeletePhilly, absolutely right. The royals do just about everything for PR. This was a blunder.
Arthur Edwards laid one on behalf of The Sun. Could you let me know to what branch of the royal family he belongs?
DeleteThe boys walking behind their mother's casket was for PR. The queen was getting very negative press at this time, and the British people were angry with her. I seem to remember a headline "Where is Our Queen?" Having the poor, motherless boys front and center at the funeral took the focus away from the queen and garnered sympathy for the boys. Another huge blunder.
DeleteWreaths are not only laid by members of the royal family. Charlotte's article above states the wreaths are also laid by members of the public.
DeleteAlso, the article includes a quote from Harry's friend and Special Soldier Dean Scott:
"Prince Harry has served his country in combat. Since leaving the military he has gone above and beyond for the veteran community and continues to do so. If anyone has earned the right to lay a wreath at the cenotaph, then it is him."
So... if members of the public are allowed... why not Harry?
Meghan is so supportive. I can not believe that Harry’s personal request was turned down by the palace, so sad.
ReplyDeleteThe RF should have allowed a wreath to be laid from Harry. There is no excuse for this, absolutely none. He served in combat and wanted to pay his respects. The gray suits need to go, they should not hold so much power over a family they are supposed to serve. They are cruel. They also seem determined to ruin Harry’s life, just like they did for Diana and Sarah. Fergie was not allowed to be with her husband when they were newlyweds.
ReplyDeleteI can understand the BRF not wanting him to fly overseas during a pandemic, but everything else is very disrespectful. I agree with bluhare that this is the first time I've felt deeply sorry for them. Harry is so closely connected with the military and that is something he has earned, no matter that the Sussexes moved away.
ReplyDeleteYes it is very sad. However they still have the option to go back to live part time in UK and attend similar functions as members of the senior Royal family. The Queen made it clear earlier this year that she did not want them to step back and that they had a year to decide what to do. However my impression is that they have definitely decided on living permanently in California which of course makes it impossible for them to regularly carry out British and Commonwealth activities. It would be quite impractical to fly back every time they decided to attend a similar event. Even if covid19 restrictions were not in place it would have been difficult and with covid19 restrictions surely they would have to go into quarantine for at least ten days in both countries? Correct me if that is not the case. Here in New Zealand only New Zealanders and permanent residents can apply to enter the country and they have to go into quarantine for 14 days. Anyone else needs to get a special exemption to enter, even members of the Royal family who would still be quarantined on arrival. This is not likely to change any time soon.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this report, Charlotte. It was so sad to read about the actions of the Palace and so moving to see Harry's response. Why would the courtiers feel it even necessary to release the fact that they had failed to let a veteran honour veterans. I don't understand the need to treat Harry with such disrespect. There is no other word but petty to describe their attitude. They seemed so proud to kick someone. I don't understand how the royal family can tolerate to see a son, a brother, and a grandson treated this way.
ReplyDeleteI was so sad to see Harry forced to leave his family and his country, but this moment makes me glad they are away from that family and courtiers. I look forward to reading about them establishing a happy and purpose-filled lives in the U.S. Little Archie will grow up playing baseball instead of cricket, although he'll probably break his dad's heart if he doesn't pick up rugby! In Canada and U.S. we honour veterans on November 11 which is a statutory holiday.
Quite right you are Anonymous@6:30
DeleteI myself coming from a military family do not understand. The courtiers FAILED to let a VETERAN honour veterans. And, why release their denial to the press? So disrespectful and disgusting. SMH
It is heartbreaking to see Harry doing this without his uniform and denied to pay tribute in London with a wreath.
ReplyDeleteHard to believe that Buckingham Palace did not learn since Diana. But every humiliation from there made her side stronger in the past.
These images of Harry and Meghan walking the Los Angeles cemetary with home grown flowers are a starch contrast to the perfectly orchestrated pictures in London that hardly vary over the years.
Well, Diana and Meghan are two very different cases. I don't think they can be compared.
DeleteYou are correct 1149. One did the leaking herself and one was the target of leaks. Quite different.
DeleteI think the palace handled this so badly. But... do we really think it was courtiers in london who leaked it? Is their PR really that bad that they would leak a story that makes them look that bad?!
ReplyDeleteI cant help feeling like BP continues to behave appallingly. And that H&M then fight back. But I dont know that it's really working for anyone?
I agree. I don't think BP is stupid enough to make themselves look so close minded and vindictive. Even if that is how they act (though I do question if things really are as those secret sources tell us). Both sides are massivly loosing in my opinion. Sometimes one looks bad, than the other.
DeleteTo play devils advocate, Which i do like to do I admit, could it be whoever leaked, or had this leaked, thought they were giving him a good set down? The story was leaked from the palace to British papers so I doubt it was Harry.
Deletenice to see prince harry a veteran pay his respects like this. i am sure he is missing being in england right now as remembrance day services are so important to him. both meghan and him look lovely. thank you prince harry for your service
ReplyDeleteoh and i echo others sentiments it is very sad that prince harry's request was denied at buckingham palace even if he is no longer an active royal family member he is still part of the royal family, he still served honourably and his request should have been fulfilled.
ReplyDeleteThat was good to do this in US.UK denied him for someone to lay wreath on his behalf. I'm glad he did in US with wife.
ReplyDeleteThe royal family and the UK are getting so low and petty that Will do that to him knowing how much he gave to UK and and the military. It is shameful and disgraceful. Thanks To Harry & Meghan to do this in US.
Christina
Harry 's not letting the malice and misdeeds of others, change his core beliefs .He is an oficer, a gentleman & an example of gentleman, & an example of genuine nobolity. Another reason that we love Harry so much.
ReplyDelete@9:24 So true! So well expressed!
DeleteSeeing those images I'm so sad. I'm not the one for gossips, and I usually don't engage about it, but the way the Sussex are still treated by the Palace is appalling. It was his rightful place to commemorate such an important event, and they deprived him of it.
ReplyDeleteIt makes you wonder what they had to endure when they were working royals...
How can the institution prevent a deep, committed soldier to honor fallen soldiers? Does no one ever say no to the system in England?
Glad he could finally find his own way to prouve his loyalty to veterans. Hope it soothes his wounded heart.
He quit the BRF, i dont understand then how you think he was deprived?? you cant have your cake and eat it too. and no one prevented him from doing this pr on his own.
DeleteHe didn’t quit the BRF! Stop parroting this nonsense. He’s still his fathers son, the Queens grandson, the future kings brother. He changed his public role in a family with a public function.
DeleteAn undefined one I might add as the supposed non working royals show up at plenty of public family events all the time. There’s no downside to his inclusion in Remembrance Day and he or his wreath should have been there.
There were flowers from "readers of the sun". Let's be honest, those are private citizen seen as a group of intend or interest. If the Royal Family wanted, they could have put his name on one of bouquets as a veteran and as a great advocate for the military exactly as the admin said so in an additionnal piece.
DeletePlus, the organizers prepared for him, which proves he was deprived from something that seemed right and normal, at the last minute.
I'm concerned by the use of that "PR" vocabulary. Does it look like a stunt to you?
Or, another viewpoint. Harry and Meghan left their positions, and rightly so, as they were clearly miserable with the life they would have had to lead as working royals. The tabloids are vile and aren't going to change and social media makes everything so much worse.
ReplyDeleteBut the half-in/half-out they wanted wasn't going to work and was refused' so they became private citizens - and not "private" in the sense the tabloids demand, as in not being seen and heard ever, but private as in no longer representing the royal family.
And that's where I think Harry got this wrong. The wreaths that are laid by the royals aren't laid as from individuals; they're laid by individual royals as representatives of the nation, just as the wreaths laid by the ambassadors aren't from the individual, but are representing the country.
If Harry had been in London he might well have been in the windows, but he wouldn't have been laying a wreath, because he's no longer a working royal and can't represent the institution. As an individual he could have found a way to have a personal wreath laid, as veterans and members of the public have always been able to do, but the pandemic meant that he couldn't ask a friend to do so for him.
I'm afraid he has to accept this. The very good podcast was the way to go.
And, lastly, I'm sorry but the photos of his wreath laying with Meghan leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Bringing a photographer along so that the photos can be published, that's not appropriate in my eyes.
I agree wholeheartedly with everything you said here. Thank you for echoing my thoughts.
Delete+1 agree with all you said.
DeleteThe purpose of Remembrance Day is an outward show of remembrance, not for all of us to stay home and think of the sacrifice on our own. The pictures were to show the military community his continued support, which he has shown in numerous ways from the US. Furthermore, when I read that The Sun (a paper that Harry is suing) had its photographer lay a wreath on its behalf, well, I have no words. And has such ever happened before? When you look at the number of wreaths laid every year, obviously many organizations are represented. Why couldn't one of Harry's patronages have been represented?
DeleteJust double standard..!
DeleteHe made a decision to leave the royal family. He can't have it both ways. I understand if you don't want to have this on your blog, Charlotte, which I enjoy and find interesting. The point is that he left the UK, left the royal role and made a decision. I think the self pity has to stop. They've a lot to give and should just move forward.
ReplyDeleteHow exactly did Harry express self pity?
DeleteYes!
DeleteExactly, Lauri. He didn't. He participated in a podcast this weekend with other veterans and talked about how important commemorating others' service is to him.l
DeleteI love both of them dearly and I love, they commemorated the fallen. Only why do they need to take a photographer with them and need to make the world know? (Pl do not delete. I would really love to read the replies.)
ReplyDeleteAs I replied above, I'm sure Harry needed to make sure he wasn't "unseen" and therefore could be interpreted as giving up on his support for Invictus and All current and former military. The military will always be important to him, and he wants to make sure that's never in doubt. We're a media controlled world in many ways, and one needs to deal with that fact.
DeleteMost importantly by taking a photographer and making the world know, they highlighted veterans and those who have made the ultimate sacrifice.
DeleteBecause they're damned if they do and damned if they don't. Surely that's amazingly clear by now?
DeleteHad Harry NOT taken a photographer, the comments would've flooded in about him not caring and forsaking his duty and his word, etc. So, he finds a way to commemorate an important day on his own and releases photographs (respectful photographs, might I add) and everyone is disparaging it. It's ridiculous.
I think there is truth to both sides of this argument. I absolutely agree that they were well advised to take photos otherwised they would have been highly criticised. But the photos do leave a bad tase in terms of how they are arranged. The aesthetic is what makes them feel slightly off. Too much playing on emotion, too many photos showcasing the both of them instead of putting the focus to where it belongs. It's tricky to explain because it is probably a very subjective sentiment. In my opinion the picture of him/them placing the wreath and a photo of the wreath in its place would have been enough. There was no need for, undoubtedly, beautiful shots that look more like taken for a magazin.
DeleteAnon 12:23 you explained that nuance very well, and agree that the photo of Harry placing the wreath was enough.
DeleteWho cares how many photos the photographer took? Not me. What really matters to me as a member of a military family is that Harry decided to RESPECT and HONOR. If you read special Soldier Dean Scott's quote above he doesn't seem to care either. He did not nitpick the photos! He actually appreciates all that Harry has done after leaving the military!
DeleteAbsolutely...you are right. Meghan is his wife.
DeleteIt’s a very sad situation for all involved. Unfortunately for Harry, this is just a taste of what’s to come. Hopefully things will be handled with a little more finesse as time goes on. The fact is that Harry and Meghan have chosen to remove themselves from England and the Royal Family. They will be able to retain some connections and an honorary title or two - but their place at important functions is forever gone. It will be very hard for him when he returns for the elder seniors funerals, his displacement will be very stark then. Their decision and choices will have some wonderful consequences for them, and some very painful ones - and this , folks, is life.
ReplyDeleteThe behaviour of the royal family at this point is the most humorous double act in modern history. On the one hand, they wish to remain defiant;an unmoved pillar that allegedly "barely notices Harry and Meghan's departure" whilst on the other hand entertaining the media driven narrative that they are the reconcilliatory beings who are willing to overlook Harry and Meghan's indiscretions, should the Sussex's return. The challenge is that the RF consistently look for ways to publicly demean Harry. The result is that Sussex fans garner more evidence and the rest of the world becomes enlightened to how petty the RF are.
ReplyDeleteIn this modern internet world, UK royals and coutiers have demonstrated to the world how antiquated and ridiculous they are. Other European royal families have modernized and adapted as shown in Charlotte's example regarding Madeleine of Sweden.
DeleteThe Windsors blatantly missed the great opportunity Harry gave them marrying Meghan: to show how racism can be defeated inside one of the most relevant and respected institutions on earth, the British Monarchy. They missed this opportunity and today is a bad day for BRF. They must blame anyone but theirselves for this poor figure in front of the world.
ReplyDeleteWelcome back Paola! Hope you are doing fine!
DeleteHi Anett, I'm just fine at the moment, thank you. Hope the same for you!
DeleteThank you for asking, we are fine too!
DeleteThank you Paola. The firm is loser. Harry & Meghan are the voice for people without voice.
DeleteIf this is true that the Queen wasn’t even informed then the courtiers involved should be fired. She is a CEO with no control of her board. How positive a story it would have been for all of them if there was a Wreath laid. It would have been something so simple that makes absolute sense based on Harry’s active service and continued support of troops despite not being a working Royal. I’m glad they did something local instead. Keep the faith Harry and Meghan. I keep saying to my husband that I look forward to looking back in 20 years and seeing how you have come through this period, come back together with family and have done amazing things for the world. Erininnyc
ReplyDelete+1
DeleteProbably an unpopular opinion, but I’m kind of torn here. On the one hand it sucks that Harry can’t lay wreath because he did serve in the military, even went to Iraq, and did a lot for them. He should be able to place a wreath. But on the other hand, I kind of understand where the royal family or the Palace are coming from. Harry is no longer a working member of the royal family. He gave up that privilege (or right) and everything that came with it. He can no longer attend any public official royal family events anymore, which I think this is. At least that was my understanding of the whole agreement they had with the Queen.
ReplyDeleteOverall this whole entire situation even after almost a year is still terrible, sad and disappointing. I feel like there’s always going to be this dark shadow hanging around no matter how hard everyone tries to move forward. Things like this is always going to be an issue.
They stripped his military titles and everything. He wanted to have those, Andrew still has all, all of them. fair, don't think so.
DeleteMaybe not in the majority, but I too share your opinion. But I also think that there is some misinterpretation of whatever was said, I don't think he was 'denied' anything, because here he is showing his respect. Probably couldn't do it in an official capacity because like you said, he is no longer a working member of the royal family. In fact, I respect him more for having his own mind to follow his military tradition in his own style. As for this continued dark shadow, it doesn't need to be the issue always. It's kind of like a cheating spouse, it is held against them no matter what and brought up each and every time, no wonder in most cases the relationship can't heal or succeed. This could heal if we all would stop trying to pick at the scab each time.
DeleteThe fact that Harry was stripped of his military ranks still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Esp considering Andrew has his. Favoritism. -op
DeleteAnonymous 14:32 and 17:26,
DeleteIf Harry "can no longer attend any public official royal family events anymore" because he is no longer a working royal, then please explain why Prince Michael who is also a non working royal was allowed to attend?
Thank you for such a beautiful article Charlotte!! As always your coverage of the Sussex's is compassionate, fair and honest.
ReplyDeleteI have so many thoughts about the decision made by BP and the continued pettiness of the royal family but I feel as though I've become a broken record around here so I'll keep my thoughts to myself.
As the daughter, sister and mother of veterans, I am very inspired by Harry's continued commitment to honor veterans. His constant work on their behalf speaks to his integrity and his understanding of all the sacrifices made by those who serve and their families. Once again, the UK's lose is the worlds gain.
Given the fact that US residents are not allowed entrance to the UK- or many other countries due to the Pandemic- I would not have expected them here. Sure they possibly could have made an exception- but at what reputational cost? was it an emergency? no. As such, to be honest, as any other US resident
ReplyDeleteBesides, they would have had to have arrived here and isolated for 2 weeks prior to the event. And we are currently in a lockdown. That lockdown limits events such as this to 30 people . Assumedly they could have been accomodated, but these events especially for the Queen are particuarly desirable and important to attend.( even in my small town we had to exclude many many people that felt that they were entitled to be there- and under normal circumstances, they would be).
They also would have run the very high risk of taking attention away from the true meaning of the Day, and I think that they both would have realised that.
I wonder if some of the stories of " refusal" by the Palaces might not be slightly skewed? Just saying...There are usually ALWAYS two sides to every coin.
Felt bad for Harry. They could have allowed a wreathe to be laid in another cemetery somewhere else in the UK on his behalf, because I'm sure if Harry was in the UK, that's what he would have done if there was no pandemic. It's a simple thing really considering that Harry has done so much to honor veterans even before he met Megan.
ReplyDeleteNo one could have kept from from organising this. Many people do. But it seems that wasn't what he wanted.
DeleteTo all the comments that Harry is not a member of the RF anymore and this what he chose and can’t have it both ways I’m so shocked at the callousness. He IS a member of the Royal Family. His wife is. His son is. The Queen explicitly said this. The line between working and not working is such an artificial gray area if you ask me. They are the FAMILY that represents the nation, not a business. Despite their “the firm” moniker. And this event isn’t a run of the mill ribbon cutting or patronage. It is the most somber of the entire year and when the traditions of the royal family’s presence is the most important. As a combat veteran he should have been there or had his wreath placed in his familial role, even if he is a separated employee or whatever metaphor people are reaching for. This game playing has taken away from the seriousness of the day, and I continue to be shocked by the RF’s consistent PR missteps. They’ve learned nothing. This would have been the easiest of wins with no down side at all to include Harry.
ReplyDeleteHis still an important figure to the military, most rank and file British servicemen and women admire him immensely and appreciate the work that he has done for them and all veterans. THAT’s who this photo was for. What’s the point of no one sees it and he goes in the dead of night. Harry is acutely aware and respectful of that link and was speaking via image to that special group. Not all of us sitting behind our keyboards sharing our opinions.
+1
DeleteR
200% totally agree
DeleteAt the time we heard of Harry’s decision , and learning he was stripped off of his rights to any military function and even his right of wearing the uniform , I remember having thought it was an absolutely disgraceful , petty decision , only meant to hurt him to the depth of his soul , a nasty revenge from narrow minded persons, whoever made the decision . I had not dared saying it on this blog , as a non British I am not always sure to rightly understand things .... to day I have the confirmation that what I felt was right , not only was he denied a wreath in his name but that was revealed through the press .... How can the BRF allow that ? That’s absolute bullying ! That’s the lowest and shameful revenge .... Seeing Harry and Meghan alone in such a day is Heartbreaking !
ReplyDeleteWe now know that there was no way for them to come to a 50/50 agreement .... it is very sad for both , Harry and the BRF .
Oh, he is definitely allowed to style himself with the title he earned in his active service as well as the unfioom. Just not the ones he got just because he was a working memeber of the BRF.
DeleteIn Britain retired military service people are not entitled to wear their previous uniforms unless they previously held a very senior rank and Harry was only a captain when he resigned from the army. He had the opportunity to sign up again but chose to retire and instead take up royal duties. Now he has stepped down as a senior royal It is a credit to him that he has continued to help ex servicemen and women who are disabled, but he does not need to wear a uniform to do that. The uniforms he wore on formal occasions were due to his position and because the Queen had given him several honorary appointments in the military. He has confirmed his allegiance to her as his Commander in Chief so it is not up to us to expect her to bend the rules for him when he no longer lives in a Commonwealth country and doesn't want to play the role she was wanting him to do.
DeletePeople are missing a very important point venting that Harry was not allowed to have a wreath laid on his behalf. None of the wreaths at that cenotaph are personal wreaths. The one that Prince Charles lays for the Queen, is on behalf of the Nation. Princess Anne's is on behalf of the Royal Navy. The Royal Air Force wreath is laid by Prince William and so it goes. Other wreaths are laid by various levels of government and organizations. If they allowed for personal wreaths, then any citizen would have a right to do this. If Harry were actually in the UK and had not left his position, then he would likely have laid a wreath for the Royal Marines, as he was their honorary commander. This was not a mean spirited move; it was following the rules that people don't lay their own personal wreaths. Harry most likely didn't realize this or had forgotten.
ReplyDeleteThe viewers of the Sun got to lay a wreath. You can't be serious.
DeleteI suppose not allowing the wreath can be explained away in a million different ways as has been the case here,justified or not, but my biggest issue is that it was leaked to the press to add insult to injury which is just shameful and meant to further hurt and humiliate Harry. I find that pure evil.
DeleteBeth R. :
Delete1++
That's the most important point.
Don't want to be a douche here but foundational arguments have to be outlined. Firstly there is a distinction between being a Royal (that is by either birth or marriage) and being a working royal. Though the latter confers responsibilities such as engagements and tours to the bearer, the former does NOT PRECLUDE one from participating (to some degree). For example,both York Princesses are not working members of the Family (but are obviously royal princesses) yet they choose to attend Royal Family engagements. They do this in a private capacity as there is no obligation on their parts to do this. To many, this dedication to royal work whilst having no obligation is viewed positively (by others it is not). Pertaining to Harry, his visit in LA was Not a coordinated Royal Family engagement. It was a private visit which he was doing in his own capacity not as a WORKING member of the Family but as an individual. (not dissimilar to the York sisters)
ReplyDeleteSecondly, pertaining to the publicity of this all I do wish to remind you that the Sussexes decision to step down was not based on a hatred of media or pictures. It was founded on a continuous abuse of the relationship between the media and prominent figures wherein a situation where one wanted positive press about him/herself resulted in that individual being forced to either provide access to his/her personal life such as the names of godparents etc OR face harsh scrutiny which was OFTEN either unfounded, untrue or already disproved. This tenuous relationship with BRITISH PUBLICATIONS influenced their decision, NOT a a hatred of photographers who take pictures without blackmail and extortion. Thus I don't see how an argument for Hypocrisy or tackiness is being pushed (even by well meaning posters) We are going to continue to see aspects pf Meghan and Harry's lives. It will be done at their discretion and at their pace. As (in my opinion) it should be!
Agree with every word anon. This whole working/not working, or political/not political is only ever a weak and manipulative argument deployed when people feel the need to fit a narrative. And often a harmful narrative at that. Yet each time countless of exceptions and alternate arrangements are exposed within the BRF by doing the barest of Google searches. I’m so tired of it. A wreath was laid for Prince Andrew. Who has been credibly accused of sexual assault among other horrendous behavior. Honestly that’s all I need to know about my final impression of this family I have followed for so long.
DeleteThank you! I find it absolutely gobsmacking that Harry and Meghan's critics don't understand what privacy means. It doesn't mean you never go outside or that you stop working in the public sphere. It means you don't want helicopters flying near your house taking pictures of your bedroom and publishing them in tabloids or drones taking photos of your mother and son on private property. It also means that the press is not entitled to know the details of your birth plans and your child's godparents so they can harass them. There are so many things I can list but I'll end with this. Meghan's private words to her father should never have been printed in a tabloid. When they left, they made it clear they intended to live a public life and continue their charity work and projects important to them; some of which may warrant public attention. It seems their critics either do not know or pretend not to know the difference between public, private and reclusive. When they're working in the public domain, they expect to be photographed, interviewed or scrutinized and that's their public life but when they return to their home and close their front door that's their private life and no one is entitled to know anything that happens behind that door unless they decide to share it. A recluse is someone who withdraws from society completely and I think there are those who would like to see Harry and Meghan do just that even though they never said any such thing. They did what anyone with sense would do if they were regularly subjected to character assassination, racial abuse, harassment, bullying and even stalking which is remove yourself from that environment and I find it odd that some of you commenting here act as though things were perfect for them in the BRF and they just up and left for no reason when that couldn't be further from the truth. There was and still is an active smear campaign against them that was clearly intended to destroy their marriage and drive Meghan out. Well, it worked. She's gone and so is Harry.
DeleteI believe the reason H&M had their own ceremony recorded is to let all the veterans know that Harry wanted to support them, to show that he tried to be a part of the day for them. I understand that he is not a working member, but he is still a member of the RF and a veteran. It seems like it would have been kind to take his wreath somewhere else rather than just ignore it. Frankly, combined with the unbelievably vile comments I have seen on posts about his wife and with the complete lack of any kind of public support from a FAMILY member, any member, I cannot see what would lure them back to the UK. I have read reports from "insiders," so they are most likely false, about how much Charles misses Archie. Sounds like PR to make the public angry at Harry and Meghan. I just cannot support the other royals because of this sort of behavior.
ReplyDeleteThank you Charlotte for your post. We all make choices and have to live with consequences. Harry has resigned his position as a working royal which is different from being part of the family. As such he longer can be part of official commemorations any more than any other service personel. Apart from anything else how unfair to other members of the public who might also like to pay their respects. Possibly a little bit entitled to hope for that. I thought Florida Moxie's comment was on point. I also thought the photographer was unwise and turned what I am sure was a very sincere action into something smacking of PR. I do feel for Harry but he will have to find another way of expressing his commitment to service personel in his new life in America.
ReplyDelete...except that members of the public do and did pay their respects. Did you even read Charlotte's full post? A photographer laid a wreath on behalf of readers of the Sun (among other public organizations).
DeleteLibby,
DeleteHave you seen the pictures taken of the event? Prince Michael is not a working royal... yet he was there.
There are commenters here who are angry with Harry and Meghan. Their passive aggressive attempts to criticize this couple are consistent through their many postings. They accused these two with the most cynical of motives without any proof whatsoever. These commenters speak as if they know the inner minds of Harry and Meghan. They don’t.
ReplyDeleteThis is what Harry and Meghan have to deal with. There is nothing wrong with them paying respect and showing the world they are doing so. It’s what people in my town do with photos and videos posted on new sites and social media. It’s done to commemorate and show respect. It’s done to bind people together.
That some people should see this as a negative reveals more of the dark, polluted mindset of these negative nellies. These people like to cast a pall and divisiveness all around.
-dedicated reader
Hello,
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to respond to a couple of points raised. With thanks to those who have commented respectfully, I appreciate it.
On Remembrance Sunday, wreaths are laid by members of the Royal family, politicians, VIPs, forces and representatives. They are also laid by youth organisations, charities and members of the public.
For example, royal photographer Athur Edwards was permitted to lay a wreath on behalf of readers of The Sun newspaper.
https://twitter.com/ArthurJEdwards/status/1325754027787902976
A wreath could have been left after the ceremony. I do think Harry's name could have been added to one given the work he's done with Invictus, Walking with the Wounded, the Endeavour Fund, Team Rubicon UK and many other military charities. Harry still means a great deal to the military community. Even if one feels he shouldn't be included, the only purpose leaking it to The Sunday Times serves is to humiliate him. Several other outlets followed up this story and confirmed it is true. By their own admission, Harry is still part of the family, so this ongoing leaking campaign from senior royal aides serves to only further widen the divide.
Consider Princess Madeleine of Sweden, who lives in the US with her family and opted to forfeit titles for her children. Madeleine has been able to return as she wishes, participate in family occasions and continue to work on the causes closest to her heart. If we look to 2019 (pre-Covid) we saw Madeleine at the Nobel Prize banquet, supporting a book fair in Sweden, attending her sister Victoria's birthday celebrations and official events associated with the day. She also attended a major charity dinner with her family and attended a series of meetings, etc. Most crucially, her mother's Childhood Foundation is the area she has worked in particularly (similar to Harry with the military), so she has conitnued this work both in the US and Sweden. There was never a question of her not doing so given her prior commitment.
Imagine if every communication between Madeleine and the Swedish royal court was leaked and sensationalised. What purpose would it serve? I'm sure there were issues to iron out - the Swedes did it discreetly. The Swedish royal family were presented with a new set of cirucmstances and adapted and modernised recognising Madeleine is the daughter of a king and the sister of a future queen. They also recognise the benefit she brings to the Childhood Foundation with an appreciation for her wish to live her life in the US.
Robert Lacey recently penned a book on the situation. A respected royal writer, it was expected his book would be the antithesis of Finding Freedom. Instead, his view on the situation was enlightening -- to say the least. He has sources going back decades in the Palace. He had this to say on the wreath laying: "I think this is an indication that things are worse than we thought. If everything was hunkydorey there seems no reason why a wreath should not have been laid in Harry's name. If the Royal family or the palace wanted to co-operate then it would seem to be a perfectly reasonable request to make that could have been fulfilled. I don't think it augurs well for the prospects of a reconciliation. On the face of this, it would seem that Harry is keener on reconciliation or maintaining some sort of link than the palace is to granting one."
Charlotte to add to this Madeleine’s husband declined a royal title though and made it clear he did not want to be a part of the Royal Family and maintain his own career etc. On the other side Meghan did not do this she accepted titles and as she said in her engagement interview was fully committed to joining the Royal family so for me this is where drawing comparisons with other Royal families and in this instance Chris O’Neil in Sweden is not a fair comparison to Harry and Meghans situation. I feel very sad for the Royal family that such a fractured relationship is being played out by those who work for them and have no feelings for the actual
Deletepeople involved.
Thank you Charlotte for this information about the Swedish royal family. I very much enjoyed reading your "comment." Another example of how other royal families handle things is the case of Princess Alexandra (now Countess Alexandra) and the Danish royal family and how things were handled after her divorce from Prince Joachim, the 'spare' of the family. Alexandra continued her patronages for quite some time, and Queen Margarethe supported very much supported her. She was not constantly put down, humiliated, and shredded by the press and family leaks. And Alexandra, by the way, is part Asian. As far as I can tell, she was generally embraced by the Danes during her time as part of the royal family.
DeleteI don't know the circumstances with the Swedish Royal Family or how they made the smooth transition. Perhaps they put a lot of thought into it and listened to each other. It wasn't so much that Harry and Meghan chose to leave, but rather the way they went about it that made so many people upset. Without consulting the Queen or Prince Charles, H&M announced via their website that they were leaving and then they listed their demands about how they would continue. Had they fully discussed this with Her Majesty and the Prince of Wales, they might have been able to negotiate a better outcome or some form of compromise. The Queen although a loving grandmother, basically said you can't be half in and half out. Actions have consequences and when H&M launched on their new path, without input from their families, they found themselves in situations that they didn't like. I will always support their wish to live their lives how they want to. But I will never understand the impulsive and thoughtless way they went about it. When you leave a job, you no longer deal with the challenges or the perks of that job. You close the door and move on.
DeleteAs another poster pointed out, the wreath are not laid in an individual's name. If Harry had been present, he could have lain a wreath for the marines,or the veterans. Not being there, and still holding an official position, someone could have done it in his place, an equerry or a family member. Without an official position, he is only a private individual representing himself. There could have been a wreath laid in his name for invictus, but who would have laid it? A veteran? It seems strange, why the two layers? In Harry's name for invictus a wreath that could simply be laid without the reference to Harry. Like the photographer of the sun that laid the wreath. He represented the Sun not his director or founding member.
DeleteI am getting confused by your keep liking Madeline to Harry - He Quit the BRF, she just forfeited titles for her children and she Didn't Quit her family. big difference. Its quite clear there is a bias here.
DeleteHello Caroline,
DeleteHarry didn't "quit his family" either. Madeleine spends the vast majority of the year in the US and will continue to do so. She's no longer an active working royal. For Harry, his wife for was subjected to an appalling campaign of abuse throughout her pregnancy. Multiple aides within the palace were actively leaking against them to the point of character assassination. Madeleine is a good comparison. The circumstances are not exactly the same, but it's worth looking at the way the Swedes handled it.
I agree Anon 00:19 and Caroline, I don't understand the comparisons with Madeline and Harry. Madeline and her husband have a completely different relationship with the royals that has been clear from the beginning. Neither Madeline or her husband are pursing a separate charity or branding opportunity. While the Swedes and Danes seem to have a healthier approach to how the royal structure works, or we just don't read about it, it IS a shame to see the BRF drama played out in the press like it is and by people who have nothing truly vested.
Delete@ Caroline in Montana, Harry and Meghan wanted to take on a role within the royal family much the way Madeline has, but also enjoy other opportunities which included making their own way financially, rather than relying on the British taxpayer.
DeleteHarry did not QUIT the royal family, he was STRIPPED of all honours except the right to use Duke of Sussex at the end of his name (and Meghan Duchess of Sussex at hers).
Philly, he was stripped of all honours when he quit working for the firm. its pretty simple.
DeleteI think money has a lit to do with it. Princess Madeline stands no chance of getting tens of millions of dollars because her platform isn't big enough. Jealousy plays a role here (because H & M clearly do have that kind of pulling power).
DeleteAs I said in another post, HRH Princess Madeleine of Sweden, Duchess of Hälsingland and Gästrikland, did not forfeit royal titles for her three children; her children have Royal titles and Dukedoms;
Delete(1) Princess Leonore of Sweden, Duchess of Gotland
(2) Prince Nicolas, Duke of Ångermanland
(3) Princess Adrienne Duchess of Blekinge
Caroline, it's quite clear you have a bias against them, beyond simply disagreeing with some of their actions. So why keep posting? The queen herself said that Harry, Meghan, and Archie are still "valued members of my family," meaning they are still royals. They're just not WORKING royals. Now THAT is quite simple to understand.
DeleteIt’s so disturbing how many comments are posted here whenever there’s the slightest opportunity to criticize the Sussex’s. The last post about the Sussex’s working to change the digital dialogue only garnered 29 comments while this post has almost 100, many made by anonymous sources who claim to like the Sussex’s but...criticism, criticism, criticism
ReplyDeleteExcellent point and quite revelatory!
DeleteNot criticism per se, but different opinions and discussion. More interesting. Also a thought provoking post, that opened the discussion.
DeleteI understand your frustration with the situation, Lauri. However, I think it helps to realize that we live in highly polarizing times. The global zeitgeist is all about opposite extremes with no middle ground. The middle ground used to be a rich place where there was respectful exchange, thoughtful consideration and informed debate.
DeleteThat's been replaced by shouting and shooting (literal and figurative) fueled by the media which is responsible only to its advertisers. The media is not held account over the damage done to individuals, institutions and society at large as misinformation and outright falsehood is offered as "news."
No one, is above criticism or reproach. All people make mistakes in their life choices. However, those who are in the spotlight on account of their fame and influence have to bear a much larger portion of it simply because of their notoriety. Is that just or fair? No.
Can we as individuals do much about it? Not really. Except perhaps in forums such as this one to consistently behave and contribute with compassion and grace and reason.
I agree Lauri! When anything happens all those "different opinions" appear suddenly.
DeletePhilly, 15:49- Simply one of the best comments I have read from you or anyone else here during my years following this blog and DK. The only hope to reclaim the middle ground is to encourage and reward those who have perspective and provide insight while seeing and balancing both the things that build up and the things that tear down on both sides of the equation. It requires patience and steadily working toward consensus and compromise.
DeleteThe impulse to put oneself and one's preferences and needs first is an overwhelming Survival drive that requires unique and dedicated persons to overcome. I've seen such selfless behavior in other members of the Animal kingdom. It is rare and blessed in humans. As it is, such people are often ridiculed and taken advantage of in life and mostly appreciated only after death.
I don't think selflessness comes naturally; until someone discovers the kindness gene, I will believe it is behavior acquired from experience. "...you have to be carefully taught" Those words from South Pacific referenced prejudice but it applies to kindliness and selflessness as well. It has its roots in the earliest years and once established, both pre judging and selflessness are engraved on a person's future behavior.
You're right, Lauri. It goes beyond simply having a "different opinion," because where are those differing opinions when a blog post highlights their latest project and all the good work they do?
DeletePhilly us being all fancy!! And I will be looking for an opportunity to say global zeitgeist!
DeleteSo what is the end goal of the RF? To ensure that Meghan is not as popular as those in line after the Queen? Knowing how the palace aides act, why wouldn't a family member (perhaps a father??!!) create a better line of communication? Knowing how close Harry was to the York sisters, why hasn't anyone posted even a "Hey, miss you guys?" H&M are blamed for the deceit of palace aides, such as leaking information about their leaving plans. Would the RF really be happy if Harry left Meghan and returned to the fold? I felt like the photo released on Harry's birthday, of the three running, was saying how nice it had been before Meghan. So frustrated here. :)
ReplyDeleteAllison, With all due respect, we have no way of knowing if the York sisters have sent a "Hey miss you guys." Not everyone feels the need to post their life's drama over social media. Beatrice, Eugenie and for that matter many others could well be in frequent touch with H&M via personal email, phone calls, or online video chats.
DeleteDear Charlotte
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post as well as your response.
In reading this, I have a visceral reaction of horror
that an admirable member of a family would be continually treated with such disrespect. Allowing someone to lay a wreath in Harry’s name would have been a simple, appropriate gesture to recognize his military service and his membership in this family. It is absolutely appalling that Harry’s request was not respected. This, in contrast to the royal’s cover up of Andrew’s disgusting behavior.
I am so glad for Harry and Meghan that they have found their footing on a different continent.
Renee
according to People magazine, the organizers of the event had a wreath & note in Harry's name there & ready to be placed when courtiers told them they could not place the wreath in Harry's name
ReplyDeleteI do not believe everything written in media publications.
DeleteHas it occurred to anyone else that it was odd for Harry to call Buckingham Palace in the first place? Does he not have direct access to his father? I think Harry had a lot of nerve to do that given how they released a website and went rogue from the BP communications team in January. I also think it is very odd for someone to wander around a local cemetery and look for graves to leave flowers on and have a photographer take pictures of it. And I think it is a bit of a stretch to say Meghan has a personal connection because her grandfather used the hospital across the street. The reporting of the photographer and his ethnic background? What has that got to do with anything?
ReplyDeleteHarry talking on Declassified Podcast makes sense. Harry and Meghan actively creating nonsensical press for themselves on a day of Remembrance in a country they left, could be construed as in very poor taste.
I disagree with the analogy to the Swedish Family. Madeleine and Chris do not actively seek to create press for themselves to use her National Heritage for attention and financial gain in the US.
The one thing that came out of this? Harry probably won't be calling BP for favors anymore. And that may have been BP's goal for issuing the leak.
I think you read a lot of Daily Mail lately.
DeleteIn case you forgot, moxie, the queen still runs things and she's based out of Buckingham palace. He asked if a wreath could be placed in his name because, you know he actually served in combat for Britain.
DeleteIt was a rational request. The decision to deny it not so much.
Florida Moxie,
DeleteAfter Madeleine renounced all her titles she is still attending events/charities by herself or with her family and being photographed by doing so. So it is not about her "not actively seek to create press" is it?
The difference is: unlike the UK media, other European media are not seeking to tear her apart as she is accepted to continue to participate in events and charities while living in the US inspite of not having her titles anymore (hence they have a modern monarchy and are not petty).
Also, a few European royals have married outside of their race and none have been attacked so badly as Meghan in the UK (remember comments like: "straight outta Compton? and her baby being compared to a chimpanzee?). How quickly we forget!
No. I don't read Daily Mail.
Deletebluhare, you are correct on who runs things at BP.
And you know who else served for Britain? Elizabeth and Philip.
And when you hang up your hat because you don't want to be "Senior" Royal anymore who do you leave behind? Elizabeth and Philip.
Let me just end on this note. Great Britain and the rest of the world have other things to worry about than Harry and his wreath. Everyone knows I am no royalist - but the Royal Family who reside in Britain have done a great job of supporting and serving the nation they lead in these unprecedented times.
I am appalled at the people who come here and all of a sudden don't know or understand Invictus, Endeavour, Walking Wounded exists. Don't understand the difference between privacy and having a public platform. TODAY you find the taking a photographer leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Please lets allow the work to continue and not destroy a move that was ultra important for those organisations to see. We need them loud, proud and visible. The veterans are just as important. The wreath was for the dead, the impact was for the living. Just because the British Media and hate filled comments they incite suggest this was wrong, how can it be when (as been documented by other commenters,) other individuals were represented who did not do 0.01% of what Harry did/does? #StopHateForProfit
ReplyDeleteSo petty. Other charities have wreathes but Harry and Meghan cannot be allowed to do so? What is the difference between a Charity Wreathe and Harry and Meghan's Wreathe? What would have been so threatening about their wreathe? And also why would the papers be the first to leak and publicize Harry's PRIVATE request that was denied? Could they have not just simply kept quiet about this and let Harry and Meghan just do their thing in LA? What is the motive for putting that private rejection out there? I think it's a deflection piece because organizers said they had a ready wreathe for Harry and Meghan and they told them they couldn't place it. BP PR doesn't want to look like a bad guy, so they tried to get ahead of the news, stir the pot, and tie that on-the-spot event decision with the early rejection made to Harry and Meghan. Once again, Harry and Meghan take the fall.
ReplyDeleteThe picture of this Prince and his wife alone in a cemetery reminds me of the Taj Mahal picture of lonely Princess Diana.
ReplyDeleteTo Anon 12:16
DeleteExcellent comparison. I agree.
But, Thank goodness there’s one positive difference:
Prince Harry has a genuinely supportive wife.
Renee
Charlotte, I love you blogs and your perspectives. Respectfully, I don’t think the situation is a very good comparison to the arrangements that Princess Madeline has worked out. First, the Swedish royal family isn’t as prominent as the BRF, nor as intrinsically linked to the image of the country as the Windsors are to the UK. Just a guess, but I doubt a lot of people outside Sweden are even aware that there’s a Swedish royal family. Whether I visited Stockholm many years ago, I sort of sought out sites related to the royals. In Britain, images of the Queen and royal palaces are everywhere!
ReplyDeleteSecond, I don’t think Madeline was ever expected to play a major role within the family anyway. Prince Harry was expected to do so. He may not have liked the role he was spotted for, but it was expected that he would take on significant engagements on behalf of the BRF, and upon his marriage, his role as an ambassador for the UK and the Commonwealth magnified greatly.
Third, and most importantly, Madeline’s decision to live abroad wasn’t accompanied by dramatic public statements about her intentions and unhappiness.
Again, Harry and Meghan have the right to live in anyway they please and that gives them satisfaction. But it appears that the dynamic for them was that they were making a choice with their decisions, and not representing the royal family was one of the consequences. That gives the keepers of the Royal Family’s image a lot of power. That may put Harry and Meghan on the wrong side of where they want to be, but they do not have power in this dynamic. I do think their public outing on Sunday was an attempt to take some of that power back, but I’m not sure it worked because it feeds into the image of Meghan controlling the PR strings. Personally, I think they would have done better to have made their cemetery visit tomorrow, which is Veterans Day in the US. (Remembrance Sunday is not a thing in the States.)
BTW, I personally believe that H&M leaked the information about him being denied a wreath. I think they believed it would create sympathy for them. And reading many of these comments, I think they achieved that.
Very sad all the way around.
Zipzipzippy I agree with you completely.
DeleteWhere is your proof that H&M leaked this info for sympathy?
DeleteYou accused them based on your feeling and then proceed to disrespect other commenters here who disagree with your stance of gullibility???
Harry was denied a wreath, so yes, lots of sympathy for him. He served his country and doesn’t need an invitation from royal family to pay his respects.
DeleteHello, I think Charlotte made a good point comparing Madelaine with Harry. I am not British and very well aware of the different Royal families all over the world.
DeleteThe Swedish Royal Family did very well not to polarize between the siblings too much.There is competition and it was not that easy to carve a way for Madelaine and her business husband but the Palace did it with them.
Harry was sacrificed like his mother and maybe Princess Margret as well - for reasons and dynamics within the British Monarchy which are complex and we do not know them fully. This did not start with the release of the Sussex Royal website. I am sorry for the ones being sacrificed and for the ones who did it or did not prevent it. It is one of the oldest patterns in mankind and it desperately needs healing.
Agree. In other words, the ways of the British monarchy are antiquated, other European monarchies have adapted and modernized.
DeleteAnd which is the only RF that’s still relevant worldwide? It seems they’re right doing what they’re doing.
DeleteExactly, 1216! You said a lot in just a few words, whether you meant to or not.
ReplyDeleteThis may be my favorite comment.
I would say more but most of what I would say has been said here already..over and over.
Just two things:
1) Public people who have the means hire PR and event managing firms to present a favorable image and promote whatever the desired endpoint is. Everyone from royals to entertainers and local politicians does this. Some attempt to accomplish this on their own; it often ends up having an opposite effect than that desired. (Diana, Andrew, for example)
2) The defining an elephant by seeing only one part story: each source has revealed only a part or one view of the whole. I doubt any one person who speaks to the press knows the whole at this point. We may never see the whole story, at least not for years. We are just now learning from Diana's brother the true backstory of that Panorama interview. The denials have stopped; the excuses and spinning have begun.
I daily have to remind myself... as I continue to try to make sense of this current story:
It is wise to be kind and to withhold forming judgements until we see all the parts. It may not take decades this time.
HRH Princess Madeleine of Sweden, Duchess of Hälsingland and Gästrikland.
ReplyDeleteHer children have titles and dukedoms; she did not forego titles;
(1) Princess Leonore of Sweden, Duchess of Gotland
(2) Prince Nicolas, Duke of Ångermanland
(3) Princess Adrienne Duchess of Blekinge
First of all, I appreciate your work with this great blog, Charlotte. and I love to visit and read every single post since you have started it. However, I do have a different, maybe not so popular, opinion on this. Harry resigned from his official role to be a senior royal. I understand that wraiths are laid not by the royals as private people, but by the official role they hold within the UK. I have the impression that even Harry himself is confused by this difference. He takes it personal whereas it has nothing to do with Harry in person, but with rules and regulations within the royal institution, he is no more part of. Of course they could have made an exception. But then every member of the public could claim the same right. Where do you draw the line? This must be hard for Harry, as well as for all the royals. The Monarchy is an institution tightly knit within the individuals of a family. We all know how comlicated business and family can be. I cannot imagine how hard it is, to be born within a family business, where everything gets mixed together and is getting even more complicated by a set hierarchy of a birth right of the family members without considering personal strengths or wishes. Harry to me seems like a confused individual who is trying to find his new role in a life he is absolutely new to. This is my explanation for why he would engage a photographer to make something public which is actually a very private act. He could have remembered and laid a wreath just as a private person without all the fuss.
ReplyDeleteHe is not a private person. H&M are making their own history. Several decades or even a century later, these are the images which will make a part of their story. It will have some effect in theirs and their descendants lives. BP rules is one thing, and they stood their ground. His observance of the day in his own way, where ever he is, and with a person he loves, is success. Make lemonade out of lemon, and life moves on.
DeleteLots of word gymnastics there. Nice try to paint Harry as confused. The Sun and the Mail have been doing this (among other mischaracterizations) for sometime now.
DeleteSuch outrage all because he, as a veteran, dared to lay a wreath to show his respect. People wear poppy, plant flags and lay wreaths at tombs and memorials and get their pictures and videos taken which are broadcast publicly. Are they all confused too?
The Firm admits to developing the royal branding to keep the monarchy relevant because to lose relevance is its death. The British Monarchy doesn’t want to be like the Swedes or the Spanish royal houses. They want to be front and center in society.
Some in the Firm finds it threatening to have successful escapees because that means there’s life outside the gilded cage where it’s possible to live and work without being dependent on the public dole. To do so means freedom and to be out of the control of the Firm. Harry and Meghan are too well known to be allowed such success.
A private person would perhaps not have the means to hire a professional photographer, but would have taken photos nonetheless. As my teenage daughter told me, would have taken selfies if by herself or would have asked other people who came along to take the picture and placed it on social media; especially a VETERAN wanting to honor other veterans (which BTW it has been done a gazillion times only diff, they are not as famous as Harry) so everything Harry does good or bad is going to be criticized no matter what.
DeleteI applaud and admire ANYONE who honors veterans pictures or no pictures.
Oh my Anon1813, I thought I was clear that I have no proof - none, not one shred, zero - when I stated my belief that H&M leaked WreathGate. I think that they wanted the public to know that they felt mistreated in a very hurtful way. It is not out of character for them to express hurt feelings or perceived mistreatment. Meghan got a lot of grief for being so vocal about her hurt feelings when she was interviewed during the Africa tour. I think it must be quite hard for them to deal with the turmoil and not be able to directly tell their side of the story, so they are finding other avenues to do so. That’s just my opinion.
ReplyDeleteI really object to you characterizing my opinions as me disrespecting others’ opinions on the matter. It appears that many commentators expressed sympathy for the way they perceive H&M have been ostracized. People are entitled to feel this way. I respect those sentiments wholeheartedly. I just happen to believe the information about this mistreat came from H&M, in part because I’m not sure why someone from the BRF felt like the BRF would come away looking anything but vindictive and small in denying Harry’s request. Regardless of how the information came to light, I certainly respect those who feel for Harry in light of the continued, apparent, estrangement from his family.
It is to their credit, I find that admirable. It is always a pleasure for me to see them. Peace to the dead.
ReplyDeleteI can't think of any other couple who have had to forge their own path with so many obstacles placed in their way over and over again. No other person in the RF has the character & perseverance of Harry and Meghan. Over and over again they've had to maneuver through all the roadblocks. It's unbelievable what they have overcome, having to reinvent, & reboot their lives in such a short amount of time since last November. That seems like a long time ago, but it has only been one year since they left for Canada.
ReplyDeleteThe RF made it very clear what their feelings were at one of their last events last March (when Meghan wore that gorgeous green dress). They were snubbed in front of millions of people. I could hardly believe it, but that is who they are. I remember being so concerned about them possibly being exposed to Covid and how smart it was to leave Archie at home.
I would like to add that for my part, I have disconnected myself from everything that has to do with the British royal family so much I am disappointed, see disgusted by this petty group ... And they come to us talk about mental health that is close to their hearts but look at where contributes to the poor mental health of theirs ... Pff pff it's so pathetic.
ReplyDeleteI find it really lamentable that in 2020 we consider the natural charisma of a brother or sister-in-law as a danger generated by jealousy instead of seeing in it an added value for to perpetuate the interest and the royal enthusiasm.Worse still, to try to oust them with such low methods.Today I just stick to what this couple does and gives. When an environment is toxic, you have to leave it: it's vital and the glitter is not worth having regrets.Especially since the Sussexes continue to do what they know how to do best, to fulfill admirably, humanely the commitments and causes Happy sequel to H&M and hand over the plight of the Men in Gray to God while doing what we can to show these little folks that their little you guys make us admire the Sussexes even more.
Ghilou, I so agree, and thank you for writing what I feel but am too upset to say. :)
DeleteAmen. Amen. Amen.
DeleteI would like someone, anyone to write an article about Royals working for free! The Sussexes didn’t get a salary! The Queen, POW, and eventually the DOC all have financial security. Is he suppose to live off of an inheritance that no one knows how much is there due to economic ups and downs over the last 20 years? Who will pay for his children’s education, or put food on the table. He’s living off the largesse of his family. What happens if the taxpayer decides no more homes can be gifted, where does he get the money for a home, security, etc. They offered to work part-time, support the Queen and Commonwealth. No they said, Cake/Eat. He lost his mother, risked his life for Queen and country, set up charities, and became a husband and father. How much more should he sacrifice for his family and country?
ReplyDeleteHe will never be king! Do they want his soul, heart, and life!
Again, who works for free!
A very well worded update Charlotte! Thank you for that. As many said before me, it very much seems they are "sacrificed" like Margaret and perhaps Diana and I'm quite certain it can end in many ways, but none of those are good. :( I'm sorry to see this, especially in a year like this. But still, I hope at least privately the brothers will find their peace.
ReplyDeleteI’m just so tired of the nitpicking and splitting hairs. Without fail every time there’s the slightest controversy over the Sussexes out trot the comments to nitpick every single detail.
ReplyDeleteCharlotte’s example of Princess Madeleine is a more than fair comparison, but of course everyone has to chime in with the list of but but but here’s why it’s different. Well of course they aren’t totally identical situations, no situation is exactly alike. Unless Prince Harry has clones of himself in other royal houses. The point I believe Charlotte is making is that there are alternative ways to fulfill public/private royal roles, many of them working with increasing success in other royal families. Even in the BRF there are HRH princesses with private jobs and lives. Princess Madeleine has forged a successful example and IS comparable to Harry’s new role even if not exactly identical circumstances. Prince Joachim’s first wife in Denmark yet another example. The difference is all of these families have been supportive in members pursuing different or original paths.
I have said many times on this blog that the royal family’s sense of tradition is both its strength and its weakness. Whether they like it or not they must adapt. These blunders are so consistent going back to the PR fiasco of Their handling of Princess Diana’s death and the pain of Princess Margaret’s romantic life before that. They rely on tradition as orchestrated by this bizarre courtier group and then repeatedly wade into PR blunders. Blunders that actually hurt people emotionally I might add. It certainly makes me think twice about a supposed charitable focus on mental health.
They don’t look good denying a veteran member of their own family a role in a remembrance ceremony. Full. Stop. Regardless of any trivial rationalizations the commentariat is so fond of providing as proof why this was an acceptable decision on the part of the BRF.
I won't comment on Harry and Meghan but I will talk about the Swedish monarchy. First, they don't have the international interest of the press nor the nasty British press. People in Scandinavian and northern monarchies are more happy, rich and tolerent and they are less envious off their royals hence the more white tie events and more gala with tiaras . You don't see that in Spain, Belgium or Britain. The Swedish protocol is very clear, the same with their communications .So the line between official matters and private are also very clear. Madeleine distanced herself from her royal activities since 2010 when her first engagement was called off. She moved outside Sweden back then to flee the local press and maybe she was upset with her father for reason related to canceled wedding. She never talked about it to the press and when she married, her husband refused the title and work offered and kept his freedom.She never until now profited financially from her positions like Christina from Spain or Andrew. In Netherland, late prince Friso, gave up his place in line of succession for his wedding. He has a job and his widow's, who have an interesting and brillant CV, is one of the richest people in the country now. Last, queen Silva is the glue between her children, she took care of her sons and dauthers in law. When you see her brue, who is the wife of a born crown prince which the constitutionnel changement took his heriditary title, playing with Estelle the future queen and the genuine love,one understand that we shouldn't compare the incomparable.
ReplyDeleteI won't comment on Harry and Meghan but I will talk about the Swedish monarchy. First, they don't have the international interest of the press nor the nasty British press. People in Scandinavian and northern monarchies are more happy, rich and tolerent and they are less envious off their royals hence the more white tie events and more gala with tiaras . You don't see that in Spain, Belgium or Britain. The Swedish protocol is very clear, the same with their communications .So the line between official matters and private are also very clear. Madeleine distanced herself from her royal activities since 2010 when her first engagement was called off. She moved outside Sweden back then to flee the local press and maybe she was upset with her father for reason related to canceled wedding. She never talked about it to the press and when she married, her husband refused the title and work offered and kept his freedom.She never until now profited financially from her positions like Christina from Spain or Andrew. In Netherland, late prince Friso, gave up his place in line of succession for his wedding. He has a job and his widow's, who have an interesting and brillant CV, is one of the richest people in the country now. Last, queen Silva is the glue between her children, she took care of her sons and dauthers in law. When you see her brue, who is the wife of a born crown prince which the constitutionnel changement took his heriditary title, playing with Estelle the future queen and the genuine love shown,one understand that we shouldn't compare the incomparable.
ReplyDeleteThis is not the first time that Prince Harry has been photographed visiting and laying wreaths on the tombs of fallen shoulders in USA. - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-22484887
ReplyDelete““Prince Harry has begun the second day of his US visit by laying a wreath at the tomb of the Unknown Soldier at Arlington National Cemetery, Virginia.
He also laid a wreath on the grave of one of the American soldiers, selected at random, who died in Afghanistan.
His message read: "To my comrades-in-arms of the United States of America, who have paid the ultimate sacrifice in the cause of freedom."
The prince also visited the Walter Reed military hospital for wounded soldiers.
At Arlington cemetery he knelt on one knee and laid a wreath at the tomb of the Unknown Soldier before standing to attention.
The cemetery holds great significance for Americans because it holds the remains of soldiers involved in every conflict the US has fought in.””
He has also been photographed visiting and laying wreaths on the tombs of British shoulders in Malawi.
Well, here is a benefit for Harry to be in the US: https://people.com/royals/prince-harry-joins-bruce-springsteen-jon-stewart-virtual-stand-up-for-heroes-event/
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ReplyDelete"Relevant worldwide"? Not... so... much... these... days. What may be relevant to you might not be relevant to someone else. It may seem right to you that "they're right doing what they're doing", but not to the rest of the world.
Thanks to social media everything is quickly translated and spread worldwide meaning: the whole world knows how this biracial couple was treated in the UK, especially the photos displaying the cold shoulder against H&M at the last event attended in the UK and how their baby was compared to a chimpanzee, ect and not ONE member of the family stepped up to say anything at all(so yes, antiquated). We are also aware that other European royals have married outside of their race and have not been attacked like Meghan and her baby.
The rest of the world is filled with countries of people of color, and yes, we can read, even have discussions on the radio about this topic. Of course I do not speak for everyone but most are disenchanted with the UK royal family.
The fact is we cannot deny that we are living in a globalized world and H&M are relatable and represent the future... but UK's royals antiquated ways did not let them realize that. Their loss.
The Palace's statement that Harry wasn't invited because he was no longer part of the working royal family seems to make the event about the royals rather than those who lost their lives. I'd just like to respectfully point out that Harry "chose to leave" because the racism directed at his wife and child, and the briefing against him and his family from within the palaces, made it untenable for him to remain. He made it clear that he was not abandoning his patronages, or the causes to which he has devoted himself. He offered to continue to work without the financial support from the sovereign grant. Harry wanting to participate in Remembrance Sunday is not the same as wanting to attend a party to which he is not invited. Remembrance is obviously a sacred duty to him as a veteran and a patriot.
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